Hey Wild Minds,

I want to tell you that,

My Daydreams are destroying every area of my life. Slowly, but it's happening.

Trying to refrain from daydreaming completely, as I have been trying religiously to do for the past 4 days, is like trying to win a boxing match with a chloroform soaked rag tied around your face. Constantly struggling to rub your eyes…

This might be kind of an odd post, sorry. I might sound kind of weird and I'm not sure if it's going to make any sense, so sorry... :S

It's apparently pretty common to pace and rock etc while daydreaming and I know alot of people say they find themself talking outloud. Sometimes I almost act it out, in facial expressions, head tilts, talking at invisible people all around- everything .  Not sure if derealization is the right word per…

Hello,

   I just recently found this site when I was trying to look up information, in regards to my daydreaming. I haven't been officially diagnosed with MD, so I hope that it's okay that I have joined. However, all the information I've seen so far about MD seems to reflect what I've been dealing with since early childhood. It was something of a relief, to be honest, to finally find information and a place where others deal with this.

   I've improved a…

Maladaptive Daydreaming had once been the greatest concern of my life, especially after I suddenly discovered myself addicted to this strange phenomenon(I prefer not to say disorder). All MDers are quite aware that the world hardly knows about this, and proper treatment or cure, to my knowledge is yet to come. In a personal battle with this curse, I have spent almost two years trying to rediscover myself, re-figure out what I really was. And in doing so, I confess, I couldn't overthrow the…

Sort of a mini fantasy involving me being my own car mechanic/electrician or Miss Fix-It-All!  It kind of feels nice.

Here's reality:

So yesterday morning my car wouldn't start yet again.  It happened before, had it towed to a shop that had it towed to a dealer to enter a security code to reset the stupid security system that disabled the fuel pump.  Only dealers have this security code.  I'm not paying nearly $300 and going without my car for half a week again!  Not…

But at least I tried... or so it goes.  Why do pedophiles get away with it?  Its way past the criminal statute for her to face charges.  And because she has purposely kept herself unemployed and has no assets, I can't even file a civil claim against her because it would waste my time and money.  She gets to live life free and without consequences for her actions.

Meanwhile on the news in a city south of where I live,…

Over the last couple of days I switched back to one of my other daydream worlds after concentrating on another for quite a few months.  The one I've switched back to, I have lots of people around who love me.  Family and friends, I'm married and have kids.  I have a brother who's married to my best friend.  I'm talented and so is everyone around me, all in different ways.  Mine and my brother's childhood is tragic, (in some ways mirroring my real life) but we pulled through and are stronger…

Taking a break from house cleaning to do a blog update.  Its been a while so its due.  Been too busy at work and not on the computer at home much lately... Here goes.

Dr. C has upped my antidepressant and one of my migraine preventatives.  Seems to be helping so far.  We'll have to see what happens in the long term.  I've noticed that with the antidepressant (Zoloft) that I've not been daydream binging.  My daydreaming is a more tolerable amount, that middle balance that I've…

been on 40mgs of fluoxetine for a while now and i can honestly say it definitely helps me to control my md.

 I still do it dont get me wrong but its much much less now than before.

 i guess this is because the fluoxetine ie prozac stops you from being able to concentrate for too long and it peps you up so you dont need as much daydream-time.

citalopram on the other hand was pure evil stuff and it got me lost in my…

For a couple months in between late December and Febuary, i sucessfully stopped daydreaming. It was amazing - i was becoming passionate about my writing and growing monumentally as a person. In a matter of weeks, I could feel the pull of inspiration and, for once in three years, I actually LISTENED to music, instead of merely pacing and dreaming. Finally, my life was enriched.

When I look back at that time, I remember a feeling of vicious hope and liberation. In short, I was…

Between work, family, fiance, car issues, and camp meetings I am just about done.  I have not had any alone time since Friday and tonight won't be any different.  I look forward to tomorrow night.  Not having alone time drives me bonkers.  Part of it is other people's drama stresses me out.  The other thing is I need me time.  Me time is daydreaming, playing video games, petting the kitty, and if its nice out taking a walk in the park.

I've missed the nicest two days this…

I found it very hard for me to daydream with my eyes closed. It may sound strange, because it seems that when our eyes are closed imagination works better and create brighter and more colorfull images.

But when I close my eyes because I've started daydreaming I can't create so bright images as when my eyes are open. I've never been wondering why's that. Maybe closing my eyes is like forcing my brain to daydream and daydreaming should be unforced.

So even when…

Today I was walking through 'my fantasy garden' (actually its just the garden in front of the courthouse where I work)...  the flowers are blooming and green leaves have finally come in.  I noticed what I thought was a big, black dragon fly.   We get those around here sometimes, I always like seeing them.  Well, this time I was wrong.  It wasn't a dragon fly at all, but something I hadn't seen here before.  It was a tiny hummingbird enjoying the nectar from some flowers.  He was…

It's summer vacation here in Philippines, so everybody expecting to have fun, hang out, go to beach and do everything. But i guess it wasn't for me, I never had a great summer that everyone should be. I am different kid from the others. I'm like a silent, shy person, weird and most of all boring!!!.(i hate myself to tell that).

I am always at my room doing some research and everything. I never went outside with my friends to have fun.(maybe in some cases) but barely!.. Sometimes, I do…

Its kind of weird, my Mom called yesterday about needing surgery and I nearly forgot.  I block it out because it worries me too much...  last night I turn to my two retreats: daydreaming and video games.  I was feeling ill, possibly the anxiety triggering another migraine, so after work I just went to bed.  Daydream for awhile, until the migraine makes me nauseous.   Then I drink some coffee (soothes my head), take a Vicodin and a anti-nausea pill.  I lay back in bed to play Final Fantasy…

... Or how Angel just can't blog one topic at a time.

So here it is Friday, and the residual pain from last weekend's migraine is still here.  Like a spike stuck in the front of the right lobe of my brain, not painful enough for painkillers just enough to be a bother.  Its alright I have an appointment on 5/11 with Dr. C, he will likely adjust my preventative medications again.  That is typical for migraine patients to have to…

Migraine is mostly gone, only a little residual pain.  I'm really tired though.

Noise is really bothering me today.  People in the hallway shouting or talking too loud, echoing, echoing...  to each other and on their phones too!  Its the courthouse and my office is in the main hallway so we get to hear it all.  Today I can't tolerate the idiocy out there.  That's the way I feel, I'm sorry.  This place was built poorly every sound echoes, so even if they aren't trying to be…