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Latest Activity

megan posted blog posts
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"Well, I did it! Thing is, I've got loads to do if I want my life back in shape. "
Ulaan Gom replied to Ulaan Gom's discussion Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming
"Day 64  - Last few days have had fairly high MD. I want to overcome this, but sometimes I feel like I'm not making any measurable progress in the right direction. I need to look into finding new approaches."
Ulaan Gom replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"I see, that totally makes sense. I'm trying my best to get to the point that you're at right now. It's been really hard to shake off MD so far."
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"Well I do have good self esteem and I got over what I did. My daydreams used to empower me as a kid, and make me believe I can do anything and be whoever I wanted to be. Then it came time to grow up and face the truth. This is ME. Apparently, since…"
Ulaan Gom replied to Ulaan Gom's discussion Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming
"Day 61 - This afternoon, I had a thick MD session. It was hard to get myself out, but ultimately exercising a bit helped do the trick. MD Observation -- My mind is craving goals and purpose, and when I think they're meaningful and potentially…"
Ulaan Gom replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"I definitely feel you on a lot of those affects of MD. However, I do think change is possible, even if it's slow, and even if it involves baby steps that take a lot of energy to take. I know things can absolutely get better, no matter how…"
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"I stopped living in dreamland at the cusp of my thirties. What bothers me now is the aftermath. I used to be a bright and healthy young kid. As I got older, my daydreams expanded and nearly took me over. So now I have problems getting focused and…"
Jul 6
Ulaan Gom replied to Ulaan Gom's discussion Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming
"Day 59 - These last few days have had their ups and downs MD-wise, though I've had periods of the day with fairly high MD.  One observation -- If I have a very specific, concrete, immediate goal for what I need to do (either for the day…"
Jul 5
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"Your version of MD sounds so awesome. What are you doing now, as a career?"
Jul 5
William replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"I've been living with MDD since age 6 or 7. I grew up an only child. Being lonely and having a vivid imagination, along with constantly being bullied because I was smaller than most kids my age; all of that led to me developing MDD. I would…"
Jul 5
William liked William's profile
Jul 5
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion Things I wanted to do
"I think I got too carried away with my fantasy life, and I should've dropped it and payed more attention to my real life. AND payed attention to people. I was crazy to think I'd be fine and still have a successful life. During the…"
Jul 3
Ulaan Gom replied to Ulaan Gom's discussion Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming
"Day 55 - My MDs have been strong today, and I've had relatively low motivation, especially towards the morning. I'm going to continue to keep tabs on MD and keep pushing forward. Another reason to overcome MD: I want to stop worrying…"
Jul 2
megan posted blog posts
Jul 2
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion I make faces when I daydream
"I may not even be dreaming. It might be a unsettling thought or a bad memory. I just can't help it sometimes. I have quite a preoccupied mind.  I grew up in a hometown for most of my life, and I was the only kid around with Asperger…"
Jul 1

Daydreamers welcome

Most children daydream. Most children have imaginary friends they play out creative scenarios with. Their fantasy world is a simple, joyful distraction from their outer lives. Eventually their outer lives take root, and they grow out of it. Their playful fantasies become unnecessary as they develop more fulfilling relationships. Their fantasy dream world fades into the past as nothing but a wonderful childhood memory. Usually they forget it ever existed.
For some of us............it doesn't, and the consequences can be drastic.

For the past 30 years I've been living in an alternate reality that has completely taken over my life. Instead of fading into the past, it became my reality. The outside world faded & faded, and I've been fighting to reclaim it. Long past the point of being a joyful fantasy, it's become an addiction that I have unlimited access to. I have no self control. I can only distract myself out of it. I'm like an alcoholic with an unlimited supply of booze everywhere I go. When I do it too much I feel sick & dazed, yet I can't stop. I've stepped out into traffic & almost gotten myself killed more times than I can count. I've gotten better & am struggling to find footing in the outside world. In the meantime, I want to reach out.

This condition has a name. It's called Maladaptive Daydreaming, also known as Compulsive Fantasizing. I spent years feeling alone and scared, like I was the only one on the planet that could possibly be going through this. I felt like a freak. I was completely ashamed and scared to death anyone would find out. It's time to end that. We're not freaks. Our brains work differently. Maladaptive Daydreamers (Compulsive Fantasizers) lead unique and enriching lives. We have wondrous gifts and gut-wrenching struggles. For the good and the bad, this condition takes a lot of strength and energy to live with. I refuse to be ashamed, and I don't want anyone else to be either.

I know there are others out there who are experiencing a similar kind of condition. Hopefully they're not experiencing it to the extreme that I have. Either way, let's talk. Perhaps we can find some answers together.

This forum isn't just for Maladaptive Daydreamers (Compulsive Fantasizers). Many disorders do overlap. Feel free to discuss any that you like. Let's keep the dialog going.

One day, I hope we can all stand proud and learn to live the best of both worlds. Once we do, I'm sure we'll feel better off for having had this condition.


I make faces when I daydream

Started by Jessica Ballantyne. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne yesterday. 9 Replies

Sometimes at the dinner table, my mom serves food, but she notices that my eyes close or I smile for no apparent reason, and she throws a curt remark. My mind is not quite there, for a split second, so I make faces. Usually I grin, because the story…Continue

Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming

Started by Ulaan Gom. Last reply by Ulaan Gom on Saturday. 154 Replies

Day 1 - I've been Maladaptive Daydreaming for over four years now, and I know that it's time to stop. I've recently been able to improve my life, but am facing some obstacles right now and want to clear my mind and focus on improvement. Today I…Continue

Things I wanted to do

Started by Jessica Ballantyne. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Jul 3. 6 Replies

Since I was 18, and went off to College, I expected to do a great many things, now that I was an adult. I dreamt of traveling the world, thriving in an art career and eventually getting married. Trouble was I wasn't being realistic with myself.…Continue

Things You'll Learn After MD

Started by Jessica Ballantyne Jun 21. 0 Replies

I quit maladaptive daydreaming in my late twenties and it took me five years to transform. Now in 2020, I feel like a completely different person. At first, I was appalled at myself for doing MD and understood why everybody found me crazy. But then…Continue

It blows my mind

Started by Jessica Ballantyne. Last reply by Enix Jun 10. 1 Reply

Maladaptive daydreaming was a way of life with me during my teens and twenties. Today, I feel that person I once was only recently expired over the Spring. Massive global change has really transformed me dramatically that I grew up a lot. There were…Continue

My life, my maladaptive daydreaming

Started by Tim Crankshaw. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne May 31. 1 Reply

Hello everyone,It's been a long while since I posted on here (a few years I think) but more recently I have become acutely 'aware' of my condition (whether MD or something else?) or perhaps it has just increased over time.Here is a little of what I…Continue

24 Jun 2020

Started by Futur5. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne May 24. 1 Reply

2020, back after 17 years since 2013. Just realize that MD still haunting me. Anyone here with long period of time.Continue

Struggles with studies - Help

Started by Celeste. Last reply by Celeste May 24. 4 Replies

  I have MDD since i remember myself and i m not 100% sure all the reasons triggerd that behaviour. One of the reasons i believe was loneliness and unhealthy family environment which caused lots of trauma.What i know for sure is that this condition…Continue

I felt it was just time to quit

Started by Jessica Ballantyne May 3. 0 Replies

Ever since I entered my 30's, I've changed drastically. In my luminous youth, I really appreciated my MDD, and I was always like "la-te-da" sugar, rainbows and stardust. Now in my 30's, I seriously want to discontinue this, because I've become so…Continue

How does MDD connect with the real world?

Started by Penelope Jane Clark. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Apr 24. 3 Replies

Hi there, my daughter has maladaptive daydreaming and I'm writing a novel where a 17 year old boy has it too.I was thinking about how to show it in the novel - so that people who don't have it can understand how compulsive it is, how it links to…Continue


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    Out Of My Mind (article I wrote on MD)

    This is an article I wrote for my writing class about MD.  

    Out of My Mind…


    Created by Cordellia Amethyste Rose Nov 22, 2010 at 7:36pm. Last updated by Cordellia Amethyste Rose Nov 22, 2010.

    Notes Home

    Welcome! To view all notes, click here. Continue

    Created by Cordellia Amethyste Rose Feb 20, 2010 at 11:14am. Last updated by Cordellia Amethyste Rose Feb 20, 2010.


    Do I have Maladaptive Dayreaming?

    Maladaptive Daydreaming is not an officially recognized condition yet. We’re still learning a lot about it. Here are some of the main symptoms that seem to be emerging:
    • You daydream more often than you think is normal.
    • You’ve built up a character(s) that’s an idealized version of yourself
    • You feel more empowered in your daydreams.
    • You’re starting to enjoy daydreaming better than the real world.
    • Daydreaming is starting to interfere with your day-to-day activities.
    • You might enact some movement, like pacing or moving your hands, (though not everyone does this).

    • Some people make facial expressions, talk, and/or act out their daydreams.  

    It's not all bad...

    Maladaptive Daydreamers have many gifts along with struggles.

    -extreme creativity
    -the ability to think through complex issues on our own
    -the ability to see issues from many perspectives (we can have intense dialogs in our own minds)
    -the ability to think quickly
    -strength. (It takes a lot of strength to live in two worlds at once.)
    -insightful and empathetic
    -loving (Even when no one's around, we still have people to love in our minds.)

    -extreme difficulty concentrating
    -sluggish. It's hard to be productive when you just want to daydream
    -clumsy and awkward
    -difficulty cultivating or maintaining relationships (This may not apply to everyone, but if your MD starts to progress, you may prefer daydreaming to real interactions)
    -difficulty completing tasks due to desire to constantly stop and daydreaming
    -difficulty reaching certain milestones because of constant desire to stop and daydream.

    What do I DO?

    Well, we're still figuring that out. Since this is so new it's kinda up to us to figure out how to deal with it. I encourage people to try anything they can & want to. If something works, please let us know, so others will benefit.
    -Identifying triggers
    Many people find that
    certain activities
    trigger them to start
    Identifying and
    limiting exposure to
    triggers is one way to
    Common triggers:
    music, tv, books,
    long walks or
    monotonous activity
    If you feel yourself
    starting to daydream,
    stop and change
    activities. Get up and
    do anything else and
    come back to it when
    you're feeling more
    -Getting out in the public
    A lot of times we just
    need to get out of our
    heads for awhile. Go
    out and talk to people.
    -Get up quickly and go to bed tired.
    Many daydream in the
    morning. To avoid
    this, make sure you get
    out of bed the instant
    you wake up.
    To avoid daydreaming
    at night, go to bed
    when you're extremely
    -Allow limited daydreaming
    Many of us really
    appreciate the comfort
    of our daydreams and
    don't want to give
    them up.
    Instead, allow
    yourself certain times
    to daydream, and
    force yourself to get
    up and stop when
    your time is up.
    -Find other things you love, and focus on them.
    Don't forget that we
    daydream because we
    love it. It may take
    time and energy to
    focus, but if we can
    make the external
    world more fun, then
    we won't need to
    daydream as much.


    Another common suggestion that people are saying works for them is meditation.  Some have said it helps them focus, even if it doesn't completely eliminate their MD.  Some have also said that Yoga and meditation help.



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