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Most children daydream. Most children have imaginary friends they play out creative scenarios with. Their fantasy world is a simple, joyful distraction from their outer lives. Eventually their outer lives take root, and they grow out of it. Their playful fantasies become unnecessary as they develop more fulfilling relationships. Their fantasy dream world fades into the past as nothing but a wonderful childhood memory. Usually they forget it ever existed.
For some of us............it doesn't, and the consequences can be drastic.
For the past 30 years I've been living in an alternate reality that has completely taken over my life. Instead of fading into the past, it became my reality. The outside world faded & faded, and I've been fighting to reclaim it. Long past the point of being a joyful fantasy, it's become an addiction that I have unlimited access to. I have no self control. I can only distract myself out of it. I'm like an alcoholic with an unlimited supply of booze everywhere I go. When I do it too much I feel sick & dazed, yet I can't stop. I've stepped out into traffic & almost gotten myself killed more times than I can count. I've gotten better & am struggling to find footing in the outside world. In the meantime, I want to reach out.
This condition has a name. It's called Maladaptive Daydreaming, also known as Compulsive Fantasizing. I spent years feeling alone and scared, like I was the only one on the planet that could possibly be going through this. I felt like a freak. I was completely ashamed and scared to death anyone would find out. It's time to end that. We're not freaks. Our brains work differently. Maladaptive Daydreamers (Compulsive Fantasizers) lead unique and enriching lives. We have wondrous gifts and gut-wrenching struggles. For the good and the bad, this condition takes a lot of strength and energy to live with. I refuse to be ashamed, and I don't want anyone else to be either.
I know there are others out there who are experiencing a similar kind of condition. Hopefully they're not experiencing it to the extreme that I have. Either way, let's talk. Perhaps we can find some answers together.
This forum isn't just for Maladaptive Daydreamers (Compulsive Fantasizers). Many disorders do overlap. Feel free to discuss any that you like. Let's keep the dialog going.
One day, I hope we can all stand proud and learn to live the best of both worlds. Once we do, I'm sure we'll feel better off for having had this condition.
I used to be an MD'er (ages 12-30), but I eventually stopped. I couldn't take it anymore. Looking back, all I remember is being out of it and not living a normal life. When I completed highschool, I wanted to travel and thrive in an art career. My…Continue
Here are some random facts,that may help.....-no one said it's going to be easy ,so whenever you fail for 5 min it doesn't meAn it's over for next 5 hours ,limit the damages as soon as possible-why to name MD nd only deal with it from that…Continue
Do you guys feel that you are overly secretive? Do you refuse to volunteer information especially in group conversations? Kind of like Clark Kent laying low as the group discusses a man a red cape flying through the air? Do you have the personality…Continue
I've just stepped out of an old cycle that didn't serve me a good life. And I'm so glad that I quite MDD. Long story short, it did much damage. For one thing, it wasn't hard for others to detect that I was in a daydream state. I once believed that…Continue
Day 1 - I've been Maladaptive Daydreaming for over four years now, and I know that it's time to stop. I've recently been able to improve my life, but am facing some obstacles right now and want to clear my mind and focus on improvement. Today I…Continue
It's funny how life looks nothing like your dreams. You want things to come true and they can. Trick is that it takes hard work, lots of energy and passion. You can't stop—and let others talk you out of it. Apparently, you can't be a maladaptive…Continue
Sometimes at the dinner table, my mom serves food, but she notices that my eyes close or I smile for no apparent reason, and she throws a curt remark. My mind is not quite there, for a split second, so I make faces. Usually I grin, because the story…Continue
Since I was 18, and went off to College, I expected to do a great many things, now that I was an adult. I dreamt of traveling the world, thriving in an art career and eventually getting married. Trouble was I wasn't being realistic with myself.…Continue
I quit maladaptive daydreaming in my late twenties and it took me five years to transform. Now in 2020, I feel like a completely different person. At first, I was appalled at myself for doing MD and understood why everybody found me crazy. But then…Continue
Maladaptive daydreaming was a way of life with me during my teens and twenties. Today, I feel that person I once was only recently expired over the Spring. Massive global change has really transformed me dramatically that I grew up a lot. There were…Continue
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This is an article I wrote for my writing class about MD.
Out of My Mind…Continue