"Thing IS. The company I brought on bothered people too much—they felt I needed self-improvement. I am neurodivergent, so I don't understand what is socially acceptable and appropriate. So I find myself around people who pick a bone with…"
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Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
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Jessica Ballantyne
- Female
- Oakville, Ontario
- Canada
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Jessica Ballantyne's Discussions
friends don't come out of daydreams
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne yesterday. 3 Replies 0 Likes
I think the reason I daydreamed, because my MD life was comforting, with perfect relationships, creating a fantasy world, but it contrasted sharply with the complex, often disappointing nature of…Continue
Pretending
Started Mar 26 0 Replies 0 Likes
I'm edging towards my 40's, so I know who I'm not. When I was younger, I used to think I was somebody else, all of a sudden, in my MD life. It usually started when I watched a movie or TV program,…Continue
I Forgive the Dreamer I Used to Be
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Mar 16. 2 Replies 1 Like
I've come to a realization that I would've been better off, if I hadn't been a daydreamer. I feel that it's put me on this spinally, random, and uncontrollable path I really didn't ask for. It never…Continue
Fantasizing about people I've never met
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Feb 6. 2 Replies 3 Likes
I will learn about a person online, it could be a public figure, even a civilian, but I never meet them and know who they are. I suddenly find that I create fantasies of seeing them in person, and we…Continue
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"I think it either depends on our personality..patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. It's what we got that attracts people. I never had that. Some people are nice to me, but others are critical minded and mean. For example I'm a…"
"you must go no contact!!
For me, it was a romantic parasocial relationship situation.
It's been 1month since going no contact, and it's gotten so much better. my self esteem has skyrocketed and I'm feeling so much…"
"Hey ! I hear you… social media is something that brings me down also, so I deactivated instagram for almost 2 years now, it’s good to be oblivious about peoples life, there’s so much out there of information that’s…"
friends don't come out of daydreams
I think the reason I daydreamed, because my MD life was comforting, with perfect relationships, creating a fantasy world, but it contrasted sharply with the complex, often disappointing nature of real-life social interaction. My imaginary friends are tailored to be supported, available, and constantly there for me. They never cancel plans, pose conflict, or fail to understand me, dropping it and taking off. Even through I know my MD friends aren't real, my mind can still feel real emotions—joy,…See More
Pretending
I'm edging towards my 40's, so I know who I'm not. When I was younger, I used to think I was somebody else, all of a sudden, in my MD life. It usually started when I watched a movie or TV program, and I would be drawn to my favourite character. Example, if I watched Star Wars, I imagined myself to be Princess Leia while facing real life situations. I've even imagined myself in male roles, believe it or not—I'm a girl. Faces always seem to switch, and I shift into other people's shoes, when I…See More
"I never realized that a first impression is extremely important and saves any relationship you could've had with someone you've just met. I lost so many people in the past, in fact, they just about turned away from me immediately, because…"
"Hey! I think things happens on it’s time. MDing like we used to is like accomplishment too, remember that we borned into a world that knows very little about MD, so unfair to us.
I always ask myself if my parents when they saw my traits like,…"
I Forgive the Dreamer I Used to Be
I've come to a realization that I would've been better off, if I hadn't been a daydreamer. I feel that it's put me on this spinally, random, and uncontrollable path I really didn't ask for. It never occurred to me the bus of consequences that would hit me, or how many people I would impact—and how it would effect all the decisions in my life. I just didn't THINK. While my head was clouded up with so many happy dreams. If I was worldly and any smarter—I would've pinched myself many years ago.…See More
Valeria Franco commented on Jessica Ballantyne's blog post Parasocial Relationships"It is sad...
Parasocial relationship can be fine and can make you feel less alone, but when we daydream about them we end up feeling even more alone in the end"
Parasocial Relationships
I tend to admire public figures and their families online, but feel that I have parasocial relationships with them. They have no idea that I think about them everybody and always reviewing their instagram platforms, videos, articles, and websites. I then start to fantasize that I am their friend and we know each other, whereas in real life, who knows how they'd react if we've ever actually met. Well I'd been a fan of this singer and learned all about their wife & daughter, brothers, father,…See More
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Jessica Ballantyne's Blog
Parasocial Relationships
Posted on February 16, 2026 at 10:01am 2 Comments 2 Likes
I tend to admire public figures and their families online, but feel that I have parasocial relationships with them. They have no idea that I think about them everybody and always reviewing their instagram platforms, videos, articles, and websites. I then start to fantasize that I am their friend and we know each other, whereas in real life, who knows how they'd react if we've ever actually met. Well I'd been a fan of this singer and learned all about their wife & daughter,…
ContinuePresent in Body, Elsewhere in Thought
Posted on January 27, 2026 at 9:02am 1 Comment 1 Like
I see that not everybody has my brain...and they're not me...but, I feel like whenever I'm around people, I got so embarrassed or burned. It does depend on the social group, but I happen to be around people who don't know what to make of me, and can't put a finger on what I'm doing in my head...to block out the their words.
I'll be blunt. I've had a lot of people respond to me in a way, they think I'm suddenly off in another universe or they're figure I'm suddenly someplace…
25 Years in a Daydream: The Cost of Silence
Posted on November 5, 2025 at 1:19pm 1 Comment 0 Likes
This may sound obvious to many daydreamers. I started MD when I was 12, and wish that I talked with my parents about my daydreaming disorder immediately when it started to make me laugh for nothing around everyone. It would've saved me the next 25 years of turmoil. Saying this, I daydreamed thickly through my teens, 20's and maybe regularly in my 30's.
My grades were bare passes and I made lousy decisions towards my future, which I eventually regretted.
In the…
If only I did it better
Posted on May 24, 2024 at 9:46am 2 Comments 4 Likes
Parents have been telling their kids over the years that daydreaming doesn't get you ahead in the world. My parents never knew that I was a daydreamer, at least my mom didn't, and I was a very quiet kid. I was always thinking and trailing off now and then. Rather than staying in the present moment with others. I didn't tell them what's been going on in that head of mine.
Whatsoever, when I was 12, my dreams began to get very thick and overpowering. It made me feel wonderful…
Comment Wall (3 comments)
- At 11:40pm on March 21, 2021,
Deep blue said…
Hey do you mind if I ask what kinda job do you do Rn? I'm still a student and I've always wondered what people like us, who have MD, do when they grow up.
- At 12:55pm on February 22, 2021,
Varya said…
- Hi. You can write to me as well, just in case. You seem like a nice and interesting person. varvaraamarantha@gmail.com
- At 5:22pm on February 15, 2021,
- hi, if you want to talk, this is my email, i can hear you, talk to a person who goes through the same situation helps. raulvasconcelosb@gmail.com
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