I'm a blab. I like to tell people about their christmas presents before they open them. I like talking about the interesting things, sometimes their relevant sometimes  their secret. But i have a need to express myself, i hate bottling myself up like this. 

This has been so hidden from view even i could't see i had a secret. My sister has caught me many times talking to myself, smiling into the distance laughing at something my characters do or say. She knows i'm a little crazy, i can…

I am doing this because i feel like it will be good for me. I know i got MD through a form of protection but now i'm too bubble wrapped by it and it's suffocating. It's why i've been depressed and anxious and have fear of social events. What i do is i imagine my idealised self- i imagine people complimenting me and how great my work is- i picture fun evenings with friends i don't have (even though i do, their all just far away) I picture myself with no worry and full of happiness. I used to…

Hello!

I just signed up to Wild Minds Network. But I've had MD for oooh, 23 years. Scary. And scary that I'm getting older... Not that I knew that it was MD for most of that time. I just thought that there was something wrong with me. Mostly that I was lazy and useless, as I could never get out of bed and get anything done because I was so distracted by my daydreams. 

So it's the start of 2017. I've never like New Year's Eve (it's sort of like compulsory fun and I've…

So, less than a week to go before 2016 kicks out. According to the internet, this has been the worst year in history. According to my country's weather forecasts, it's been the year with the hottest summer ever (they say that every year). According to my own experience, neither of those.

But experience is subjective. Different people exposed to the same event almost always internalize it in different ways. We are limited to our own point of view when it comes to first-hand experiences,…

One day I will go hollow,

Don't worry, you don't have to see my face again.

One day I will lose this sight of who I am,

Don't worry, you don't have to hear my voice again,

One day I will not care anymore,

Don't worry, you don't have to hold my hands again,

One day I will fall down,

Don't worry you don't have to pick me back up again,

One day I will not dream anymore,

Don't worry you don't have remind me of anything again,

'Cuz I don't…

Its been forever since I've posted her, but I must say that I've finally found relief. I found it through writing.

Now when I say this I really mean it. Everyday I set two hours aside for me to write whatever it is that comes to mind (I prefer 7pm-9pm). And now I'm actually developing two short stories and a novel. Heck, I've even taken writing class to perfect my craft—fiction writing has become my new study.

So perhaps, for some of us, a great relief from the vastness of MD…

So when you are saying the affirmation people suggest to believe that it is already working and happening however you always don't feel like that, for exmaple  when you're trying to believe everything is okay when it really isn't,

.The researchers suggest that, positive praise and affirmations, such as “I am a lovable person” was incongruent with the mindset of those with low self-esteem... this led to feelings of conflict and just feeling bad... which then led to more negative…

Procrastinating is kind of similar to excessively daydreaming.So i decided to do these hypnosis on you tube to help you stop Procrastinating.So far after a week I got all of my work done at my school, didn't daydream etc. but then I got busy and didn't have time anymore but I would definitely say that they were working.Also when I was surfing the web on my computer I listened to this video :…

Hello! 

So, my last blog post was about how well I was doing. That's still happening. I am doing well- but I've realized why I developed MD in the first place. 

I've avoided going home for a really long time because it's a major trigger. My family complains constantly, but there's also nothing to do. These people do nothing all day, watch Netflix, and talk about how they're misunderstood. When I lived here, I had nothing to ether. Not only was I completely trapped here,…

Sooo finally I get myself to tell a bit more about this Black Unicorn, creeping around here more often recently.

Well I'm 27, from switzerland and right now I'm studying german philology and cultural anthropology (no you're not stupid if you don't know what that means, nobody does :P )

I like music, mostly somewhere between Metal, Gothic related stuff or medieval tunes. Which is also a huge trigger for my MDD, even the most boring popsong has potential to become a…

Hello Everyone,

I experience MDD for many years just like everyone else here. I've been working with a psychiatrist and psychotherapist for almost a year. I see some improvement. I have an idea and hopefully more people will join my thoughts. I would like to organize biweekly/monthly in person meetings. They would be like group sessions. I believe we can help each other. I personally live in Washington DC area. Please let me know your any thoughts or/and ideas. Looking forward to hear…

Hi all... I have started to write my MD story into a novel, based on the suggestion of one of our WMN friends. The first chapter is up here.

Would like to hear from y'all on it.

Many thanks!

The earliest signs of mdd I remember was in my earliest memories. For quite a while, I had believed that I just had imaginary friends, who'd I play with for hours at a time. But now, I believe I recognize signs it wasn't simply an imaginary friend.

I was extremely close to my friend, and insisted it was real, because it felt like it did. I was so determined that I was tested for schizophrenia. However, I knew it wasn't real. I'd spend time confused why something I knew wasn't real…

I wander up the village’s hill,

Autumn day is falling.

A rising breeze, i feel it’s chill,

Silent nightfall’s calling.

When shadows through the forest creep,

Night Owl’s crying lonely.

I watch the trees for long asleep,

Thoughts are talking only.

As vision’s flying far away,

Pictures seem so close,

Of worlds I wish to see one day.

Where my wind blows, who knows?…

As some of you could clearly tell by my ramblings in chat these last two weeks, I've been having an increasingly hard time in keeping my sanity in check. Numerous aspects that had persisted for eras are coming into harder and harder friction against reality, whether I like it or not. Streams of thought that I had somewhat managed to chain into the back of my head for years are gaining unprecedented power.

My mind is fragmented, falling to pieces, and each of those pieces is fighting…

Hi guys, these days it's been hard. I don't know, I've been daydreaming a lot instead of studying, I've been wasting a lot of time. I resist it but I get really tired and sleep in the afternoon only to waste time on the internet in the evening, I go to bed late, I planned to watch 2 movies every weekend but that's not happening, somehow. My entire method of scheduling my day has fallen apart. I get really cranky and, just when I'm about to lash out or am in the process of doing so, an inner…