November 2013 Blog Posts (54)

Feeling Lost

I quit daydreaming. I also stopped listening to music (major trigger that I can never resist), limited TV, “internet”, certain kinds of print media  (like women’s magazines) in favour of productive activities. The other rule is that I cannot spend the entire day obsessing about my “self” (i.e. reading up on shyness, introversion, schizoid, identity, self confidence, depression and so on, basically trying to find a diagnosis for “what is wrong with me?”). To give my mind something to…

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Added by Amanda Lewone on November 30, 2013 at 2:48pm — 6 Comments

Physical Sensations.

Today I woke up at 7am went outside to listen to music and smoke a cigarette. While Listening I, like many others, let my mind create elaborate battles and scenarios.

I was so enthralled by the fantasy that I began to feel actual physical tingling in my chest and stomach. A gut and heart wrenching feeling that I assume I would have in that situation.

I was wondering if anyone else had felt these sorts of sensations, maybe even fear or perhaps induced a panic attack. If so I'd…

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Added by Cody on November 30, 2013 at 1:24pm — 7 Comments

Maybe it's stupid but I'm gonna try ...

It must be a dumb thing to tell yourself that you will start quitting on the 1st day of the month, on the first day of the year etc. but I don't know what else to do. Also it's quite obvious that quitting seems so real because of the fact that I have spent the whole day dancing and DD and I don't have such a strong urge to do it at this moment. But I will soon. I'm determined, but so have I been before, but who knows, maybe this time it WILL work? And if I fail I still got the - "New Years… Continue

Added by Elīna on November 30, 2013 at 11:17am — 4 Comments

I Got The Job!

I applied at the post office a few weeks ago, took the postal exam and passed but I didn't think they would select me. I usually don't get call backs because of poor work history or I get scared and punk out of scheduled interviews. In the past, I always got distracted by daydreams and missed job opportunities. I used to have a major fear that employment would take up too much time. I feared I wouldn't be able to daydream and it would make me miserable and I'd quit. Instead of finding out if…

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Added by Lauren M on November 29, 2013 at 7:30pm — 5 Comments

Not dancing to MD=not doing anything ...

It looks like a 2 day trip with a close friend and a big bottle of Belgium cherry beer can help me to not DD. Sadly it helps me to not do ANYTHING. I'm not living, I'm  just existing.

Added by Elīna on November 29, 2013 at 11:05am — 5 Comments

Pushing people away

Yes I know it's another stupid blog about me but I'm sure you might be interested in hearing... So um yeah well here it goes, Life is far too full of disappointments for me so much so that I just go as far as I can to push people away from me. It's not like I try to hard people are very judgmental about me anyways, but in any case I do try. There was one point about a few months ago where I had made up this whole thing about not liking a president in order to try to push away girl who is being… Continue

Added by Mишка (Miska) on November 28, 2013 at 10:02pm — 2 Comments

I'm torn betweeen continuing and truly stopping this.

Hello, everyone... 

Have you ever found yourselves in the following situation?

Lately, due to what I believe to be gradually accumulated stress arousing from difficulties in my every day life, I find myself repeating patterns I thought I had weaned myself off some time ago. For the record, I have been an obsessive daydreamer since I was about six - I'm thirty now. Those patterns include rapid walking when I'm out while listening to music, acting out scenes from stories I'm…

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Added by Telepsa on November 28, 2013 at 2:00pm — 2 Comments

truth-today and right now

This is for anyone who has the time and interest for this blog. Its basically just me rambling.

 

Today, i worked an 8 hour day. For which, i am very greateful for. Especially since Thanksgiving is tommorow. For now, it was just for today, but still, its better than nothing. I hadent woken up that early since high school. I got ready, did my makeup, (which most of the time im too exauhsted to do). I was proud of myself. On my way to work, i tried to stay forcused and not DD.…

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Added by Sky with Diamonds on November 27, 2013 at 9:07pm — No Comments

just out of control

I recently discovered that what is happening to me is a disorder. I have been goin through it since 6 years or so without having any clue about what was happening to me. Its such a disturbance at times. I have lost my life due to all these stupid fantasy worlds! No friends no goals no aims! Just imagining and laughing. Ofcourse i enjoy doing it and i find pleasure in it. I am addicted to it. Its creative and i write many things and people like it. But what is the use of living in a fantasy… Continue

Added by simran k on November 27, 2013 at 9:25am — 5 Comments

Another bit about me

In the absence of other humans' presence I thrive,

Yet with out other humans I do not strive,

Even in the light of day,

I cannot keep these thoughts away,

My heart is heavy,

No crime is petty,

I must walk straight and steady.



In all this searing searing heat,

I control an ocean fleet,

In the freezing freezing cold,

I become Great and bold,



Without love without war,

Nihilism forevermore,

Alone desolate silent… Continue

Added by Mишка (Miska) on November 27, 2013 at 12:10am — No Comments

A bit about me...

In this world there are few kinds of people. There is there is bad and there are some in between but I am not sure which of these I am. it depends on perspective after all, if you need me you would be able to choose. But for now we'll just go on the information that I must tell you. I admittedly am very self-conscious person, sometimes I don't know the words that I want to speak at least the short-term words anyways therefore I must speak in a way that's over scientific to others. People find… Continue

Added by Mишка (Miska) on November 26, 2013 at 11:44pm — 3 Comments

Eviction

I procrastinate and procrastinate and procrastinate. I have procrastinated my treatment, my action, my decisions and now things have come to a head. My parents want an answer by tomorrow. My landlady told me on Friday she’s kicking me out (I am paying rent on time- but she doesn’t like me, I don’t do the social niceties the other girls tend to do). My mind is a flurry of memories and emotions, most of which I can’t control. This has prevented me from acting on decisions and taking-charge of…

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Added by S K on November 26, 2013 at 9:24am — 2 Comments

CUT - COPY - PASTE

            I am not very good at expressing myself so as usual I found something which reflects my feelings better than me:

From a blog on mental health (specifically schizophrenia and emotional health):

 

We all get bothered, flustered, disillusioned, or disappointed from time to time (in varying degrees), and it would be dishonest of me to pretend I’m any different. If you can express yourself in a constructive way that doesn’t hurt anyone mentally,…

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Added by S K on November 26, 2013 at 9:00am — 1 Comment

I feel so empty I can't even DD anymore

I feel the need to pace but when I start I snap out of it. When it first started I thought it was due to me 'getting over it' but now I realise it's something more.



I feel so empty. I don't want to do anything anymore. It's warming up and school is over and so are exams yet I don't feel like doing anything. I feel so empty and so much more demotivated now more than ever. I feel alone and I've pushed my friends away because I feel rejected.



I'm so anxious and sad, I just… Continue

Added by valentinah on November 26, 2013 at 3:41am — 3 Comments

Thoughts

A lot of people think helping someone is the good thing to do. They are wrong.

Helping someone is the Normal thing to do. When you do something extraordinary, or try to do something beyond your capabilities to help, that's when you could say- Yeah, now I really did something good. This way of thinking should be natural for people.

I'm writing this, because sometimes it's so easy, it takes just a few worlds, just a phone call, and you can instantly make someones day brighter... so…

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Added by escarei on November 25, 2013 at 3:17pm — No Comments

I can't last a day ...

I'm going to do it. I just know it. I'm trying to stop, but I know that I won't. I want to fix 2 major problems in my life by imagining that they are ok. I know it won't help, but I just wanna feel good, imagine everything working out smoothly. I don't know how to stop myself. Right now I'm waiting for my phone to charge a littlebit so I could start dancing and DD. I should be learning for my Latin language exam or I might not pass it tomorrow. I need to do my English essay and working…

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Added by Elīna on November 25, 2013 at 11:49am — 6 Comments

BANG!!! HERE I GO AGAIN

I haven’t seen myself in such a state ever since I discovered this site. Ok I was just at home ALONE playing computer games when I started day dreaming, I tried to stop myself but it was so good, I was rolling in it and convinced myself an hour would not hurt anyone. It was Saturday midday and it went on to Sunday, I had plans with a friend on Sunday could not make it I then switch off my phone and spend my whole day dreaming. Today I feel so exhausted like I was travelling the whole…

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Added by Bonnie on November 24, 2013 at 10:23pm — 2 Comments

I will try again

I have tried many times before to just quit it, at least rule out the part where I do it while dancing to songs, because that is the part that eats my time the most. Just hearing a song and starting to DD or starting even without noise whatsoever isn't that bad, I can make myself stop and even if I can't it still isn't as bad as the dancing. Because when I start that I just can't seem to stop. But I must this time. So ... 1. - I have a life that has great people in it, I must keep up with my… Continue

Added by Elīna on November 24, 2013 at 1:32pm — 4 Comments

Daydreaming even when everything goes right ...

I have tried to stop this for years. I can't take it anymore. Sometimes I do good for a few days, in very good cases for weeks, but then I just snap in one moment, I let myself to do it for just few minutes, it feels so good after a break, but then the  minutes become hours and so on ... The worst thing is that a few years back the only reason why I did this was to escape my miserable life, but now a lot has changed. The worst thing now is that when something really good happens in my life I…

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Added by Elīna on November 24, 2013 at 12:20pm — 2 Comments

Crossroads

I just went through probably a two week period of barely DDing. I'm sure this is absolutely normal for all my life I just never noticed it. Just until months ago when I found this site did I ever begin to notice the cycle or lack thereof of one that can be attached to my DDing. 

I definitely do not DD all the time. I might not even do it daily but I think sometimes I do it by habit fleetingly and so I don't even register that it happens sometimes. I DO think that I usually always DD…

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Added by Stormy on November 24, 2013 at 11:30am — 2 Comments

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