Well, I still have to say that I need work. My daydreaming is an ongoing thing that I have to use a lot of strength to fight. It’s hard for me because at the moment, I just go to work and go back home. I really don’t have that much going on right now, so I’m am desperately looking for something to interest me in the real world. It affects me when I am at work. I can still function, but I really appreciate NOT having this…

In the past years I realized I had a problem, but in a subtle way, intangible, a thought that vanished when I tried to touch. The snow. A soap bubble. 

I realized the problem the day I come here, like 6 months ago.

I'm succesfull in managing the DD, althought some dark days…

Sometimes I feel like the rest of the world is against me, and so I want to disappear. Am I just being paranoid? Probably. But it doesn't matter, because I still don't like the agony of wondering. I am so caught up in what people think of me...it's exhausting. I can never relax.

I've decided to move out into my own place. My own space would be nice. A place to call my own and not have to keep looking over my shoulder to see if what I'm doing is right, or ok.

This is why I…

Hey there,

Sorry this is going to be a quick, random post. I just started seeing my university therapist and when I mentioned that I have sleep problems, she suggested I try Melatonin. I know that it's a naturally produced chemical in your body and that maybe sometimes our bodies just need an extra little boost to produce it, and I want to give it a try to regulate myself. My brother accidently got me the extra-strength 5mg ones, and I want to start off slow, does cutting them in half…

With some suggestions on here, I've decided to give out where I post all my poems and crappy drawings (XD I'm gettig better.).

My name is jesd2 on devaintart.com

Here is a link http://jesd2.deviantart.com/.

I post a bunch of poems, besides MD.

XD This blog post, is really short.

    A few weeks ago I had a neurological exam. My therapist suggested it because she thought it was possible that I had Obsessive Complusive Disorder or was on the Autism Spectrum. I honestly thought that I wouldn't recieve a diagnosis. Yesterday my mom told me I was diagnosed with Asperger's, O.C.D, Depressive Disorder, and one that she wants to find more about before she tells me (which is very concerning to me).How does someone walk out of a three hour appointment with four…

Ever hear that phrase? "It's just my OCD." Honestly, I've always hated that phrase. People say it all the time, but don't really understand that the little quirk they are describing as "OCD" is actually known as an Idiosyncrasy. 

The difference…

I'm new and would love some help getting around this site!

I never knew there was a community for 'dreamers' out there. Glad I found a group! :]

My house-mates and I sat down last night to have a "Star Wars" marathon... and I got bored with it very quickly. Just not my thing I guess. (However it is quite long!) But we did finish the last episode just now... and I did see that to the end.

I'm finding it really hard to be interested in films these days. And I'm worried that my MD world has taken over my ability to enjoy good movies. Or even TV for that matter. My friends start watching something, then I get bored, and go into my…

Old, heavy and sense-deprived

Time slips by as sand between the fingers

Then it slows to a drone

The part I am acting

I know not of another part to act.

Held closed by fear

For years the old stones and pearls

In the withering box.

When a wind of obsession comes flying through the box

I can’t help but catch it.

And keep it for years in this old box.

A self-sabotage is what it is.

So, I know it's pretty typical for MDers to have music be a trigger for them, in fact it seems that the greater part of the majority is this way. Today I was listening to some good ol' tunes while daydreaming and it got me thinking about how the music is used. See, this is kind of embarrassing as I don't know how it triggers you guys but, for me, my characters usually are singing the songs themselves. Not like it's HighSchoolMusical Revised or anything, but most of them play in…

Whispers from the wispy fountains,

lieing forever with the youth fountain.

Dreaming of a different world.

It's quite absurd,

to spend my time,

filling a poem with rhymes

about dreams.

Because my mind is not what it seems.

It's filled with characters

pushing between barriers,

of fantasy and real.

During the day I find myself once again, reeled

into a daydream,which I can't run this…

It's not that I don't like her music - I love her music. It's just it's seriously interrupting part one of my novel and if I am going to do this thing, compulsive daydreaming that is, I am sure as hell going to get something productive out of it in the process like learning to write fiction.

On the other hand Adele will be artist of choice as soon as I hit part two.

I've had a surprisingly lovely day today. Lots of baby cuddles and kiddy fun. Even though I'm an adult, kids are great to be around and I like to become one of them when we're together! (:

I don't have children myself, so it's nice to be with someone elses for a while. My friends' 6 week old little girl fell asleep in my arms and I really loved that. What a great birthday hey. And I'm thankful.

So I haven't checked in for some time now.... I guess I've been pretty busy. But maybe not so busy.. I don't know. I'm living back at home now. Still daydreaming. No job. No school. I do babysit quite frequently for some broken family in the neighboring town. And I've been very active within my church. But that's all. I've been reading reading a lot of manga recently. It's been making me daydream even more. I try to stay away from home as much as possible, if I'm out with friends then I…

Someone wise posted this today on her Facebook page and I am going to share it with all of you

THE PAST SHOULD BE LEFT IN THE PAST, OTHERWISE IT CAN DESTROY YOUR FUTURE

LIVE LIFE FOR WHAT TOMORROW HAS TO OFFER, NOT FROM WHAT YESTERDAY HAS TAKEN AWAY

Don't mind if I have no energy to get up and do things today. I can stay in bed and live through my favourite DD's. So I'm giving in today. But does it really matter?

I've spent most of the weekend with people (in real life) and it's exhausting. I couldn't wait to get home to my favourite people! But it is sad that they are only in my head. They are the only ones who make me feel good about myself.

Saw my counsellor last week and told her my secret about DDing. It was really…

Okay so I haven't written any poetry in a while about MD so I figured I would today.

Daydream away

listen to what the voices say.

"Dream more,little girl,

of diamonds and white pearls.

Don't leave this place.

I can see it in your face,

you want to stay

here all day."

I run from them

as they dim

my senses of real life.

Addicted like self-harmers and their knifes.

I'm not crazy.

Just stuck…

i'm aware that there is still much more to find out about how many people there are out there in the world who have maladaptive daydreaming, but for now i'm going to assume that the ratio of non-daydreamers to daydreamers is very different (as in theres wayyy more people who don't have maladaptive daydreaming)

anyway, my thought was this, what if it was the other way round? if it was 'socially acceptable' and 'normal' all over the world, to have these daydreams? and because people…