I have last posted here last year and since my therapist has helped me shed light on my unusual daydreaming. It turns out I am a inverted narcissist. What is it? among other things it's immense preoccupation with fantasies of ideal beauty, power, money or other...but its's all done within the privacy of our mind. That's why we call them the INVERT Narcissists- That's because on the exterior the individual typically appears modest, even shy so that nobody knows what is going on inside them-…

"One day I will ask you, what you think about me" has broken my 2 months of DD abstinence. I've spent a week in rumination trance, observations and talking my thoughts. The good thing is that I learnt zero DD at work. The bad thing is limiting my sleep to have time for rumination. The worst thing is that I got emotional, really emotional, crying for no reason and almost having nervous breakdown. And now I'm back, ready to stop again and ready to take responsibility for what's…

For the sake of privacy names have been changed.

Also, there is some foul language in this blog, so I apologize in advance.

And I want to apologize for giving you the short version of my dream, it was just too much for me to write down. (-___-) Sorry. But I do hope you …

Hi All,

For the past couple of years, I have been searching for a name to discuss my behavior. After leaving college, my fantasies and daydreams took on a whole new level of reality for me, sometimes spending days in a hypnotic trance, pacing the same stretch of carpet back and forth, imagining myself anywhere but here. I was fully functional, holding down a job and paying my bills. But I felt that I was betraying myself living in the corporate world I had professed to…

I can't promise this works for everyone, but I've found that I can manipulate my daydreams so they become boring or unpleasant. If you can make everything go wrong in your daydream world, the real one will seem more appealing.

I've spent the last few days imagining I'm right in the middle of the London riots, and it always pushes me back into reality, where I'm far away from London, safe and sound.

It doesn't always work of course. Sometimes you just end up…

i have had the same daydream story for a little over two years, and i've found that only two of my characters are completely original- looks-wise and personality-wise. all of my other characters are based on celebrities, people in movies or books, or (rarely) people i know in real life. i feel like this makes me less creative than most MDers. i know that i'm way more creative than the average person-- i mean, i have an entire imaginary world inside my head, i'd be stupid to think that i'm…

I realise this may offend people with serious mental problems but I love the term "basketcase". That's what I am, I'm a basketcase. Thinking this way helps me cope, puts a smile on my face. I'm happy and safe in the knowledge that by having all this chaos in my head, I am carrying on a fine tradition of British eccentrics. Everyone on this island is slightly odd in some way, I figured I'm no weirder than the other 60 million inhabitants. The stereotypes are true, we're all just Monty Python…

I've been like this since I was 8, when we moved away from my hometown and all my friends to a town where I never fit in and had great difficulty making friends. My little brother adapted well, I did not, so I just disappeared off into my own little fantasy world where I've been everything from a secret agent to a rockstar to things as banal as a guy working in a coffee shop (I mean, what's that all about?).

I'm happier than I used to be. Four years ago I moved for a second…

 I wonder what "normal people" think about. I see them driving in their cars, going to wherever they need to be and I wonder "Is it like a machine in their brain saying 'Drive to work, stop at light, go when it's green, mmmm I want a steak for dinner'." I know normal people have hopes and dreams but what is it like for them to just think about it a little bit? Are they thinking about the task at hand and does their mind wander only a certain distance until reality reels them back in? When…

Sometimes, I almost feel afraid that I don't really have Maladaptive Daydreaming. I mean, I know it's stupid worrying since it's OBVIOUS (to anyone who's seen me at the age of 7 - present and who knows about this disorder) that I have MD, but I feel worried that I don't have MD.

I know that it'll seem really weird, but if I think about discovering that I didn't have MD, I would actually feel sad. Rejected. Depressed even. I can just imagine, in a few years, when psychologists have…

      Somedays it makes me want to cry. To know once I stop day dreaming i'm back in the real world, im stuck with my real thoughts, real people real things. in a real world your no in control of. To know everything I just day dreamed of, the perfect everything would never come true.

    Everytime I feel like i've wasted a part of my…

So I have a week off work and my plan was to cut down on the MD'ing, get some housework done, clean the garage, solve the debt crisis, and at least have something to say when someone asks how my vacation was. Nopes. Not happening.

 When I was younger I imagined my daydreams were plans for the future, then I got older and decided that they were still ideas that I could put into action. Now I'm nearly 38 and well....they are just day dreams. The "me" in my day dreams is getting older…

Yesterday a member posted some pics that I found beyond shocking and offensive.  He posted a pic joking about rape, another joking about murder, and a photo of Osama Bin Laden.  I deleted them as soon as I saw them and emailed him angrily asking why he thought it was okay.  He sent me back a long email basically saying that it would be okay if he posted a pic of Bush and that it's basically the same thing.  It is NOT the same thing.  

When I mentioned this on facebook another member,…

I HATE MY mind. It goes from A to Z in the blink of an eye. Sometimes I feel like my body is just along for the insane ride that is my dreams. It's odd to me that some people tell me that they don't dream at all. I just sit in envious thought about how I wish I wasn't disturbed each night with dreams that leave me waking in the dark, screaming out or crying. I've given up trying to get control of my dreams. A counselor of mine told me that…

OK, today I had this brilliant oppourtunity to daydream. My Dad is the technician for a disco buissness, and he was doing a party for 8 year olds - I went with my parents to show the kids how to do some of the dances.

Anyway, we set the equipment up on a stage, but there were 2 curtains - one hiding the main stage area, then there was a black curtain about 21 feet behind it, and the distance between that and the wall was about 3 feet. That curtain stayed closed for the whole disco.…