Well, hello everyone on this site. I’m new here, and I would like to introduce myself. So, here it goes…



I want to start by saying I’ve been lurking around this site for several months now, without having the courage to make an account. My name is Elizabeth, also known as Lizzie or Liz, and I’m a seventeen-year-old high school/college student. I enjoy listening to power pop, drinking tea, writing in fancy journals, and daydreaming.



Oh, I love daydreaming. I often rush home…

The darkness. That's all that I was aware of. Was darkness. My eyes were open, I know they were, but I didn't see anything. I even did that thing where you wave your hands in front of your face, hold them there for a second to try to see finger silhouettes. But nothing. I sat there, I don't know how long it had been. I decided to search. Groping around on the floor trying to figure out where I was. I came across a wall. It had a cloth over it. I pulled downward on it, but it didn't come off.…

     "Dan, you are suffering; you do not fundamentally enjoy your life.  Your entertainments, your playful affairs, and even your gymnastics are temporary ways to distract you from your underlying sense of fear."

     "Wait a minute, Soc."  I was irritated.  "Are you saying that gymnastics and sex and movies are bad?"

     "Of course not.  But for you they're addictions, not enjoyments.  You use them to distract you from your chaotic inner life - the parade of regrets,…

Tomorrow

Today was bad. And when I say bad, I mean bad. After a hard day at work and sitting at home and doing nothing but watch tv, I decided to go outside to run. I am trying to live a healthier life. Nothing wrong with that, but the problem was that I brought along with me my music. I tried to convince myself that it would not be a problem, but it ended up being a major problem. I fantasized about bang a track star; turning heads. Then I fantasized about me dancing with a guy I…

So yea..... I've been reading through a lot of poetry from you, my fellow MDers. I haven't written anything in a long time but I went back and had a look at the stuff I used to write and thought I'd share the ones I like. So I guess I'll start posting some of my old poetry and miscellaneous writings with you all. ENJOY!

You Lie So Much, You Believe Yourself…

I'm new here and I would like to make some friends. I just started researching MD because I wanted to know if other people had the same experiences as me and it is nice that there is a community out there for people like us! 

Ok, so I got huge spikes in my DD today while @ work. Mind you, I have a college degree and I am working as a cashier/food preparer. So that really gives me room for creativity (ideas for DD!). I'm grateful to God for my job, but God knows that I want a real job. So while I was working and doing the normal routine, (sweeping the floor, cleaning equipment, ect.) I imagined that I was making lots of…

Well, I still have to say that I need work. My daydreaming is an ongoing thing that I have to use a lot of strength to fight. It’s hard for me because at the moment, I just go to work and go back home. I really don’t have that much going on right now, so I’m am desperately looking for something to interest me in the real world. It affects me when I am at work. I can still function, but I really appreciate NOT having this…

In the past years I realized I had a problem, but in a subtle way, intangible, a thought that vanished when I tried to touch. The snow. A soap bubble. 

I realized the problem the day I come here, like 6 months ago.

I'm succesfull in managing the DD, althought some dark days…

Sometimes I feel like the rest of the world is against me, and so I want to disappear. Am I just being paranoid? Probably. But it doesn't matter, because I still don't like the agony of wondering. I am so caught up in what people think of me...it's exhausting. I can never relax.

I've decided to move out into my own place. My own space would be nice. A place to call my own and not have to keep looking over my shoulder to see if what I'm doing is right, or ok.

This is why I…

Hey there,

Sorry this is going to be a quick, random post. I just started seeing my university therapist and when I mentioned that I have sleep problems, she suggested I try Melatonin. I know that it's a naturally produced chemical in your body and that maybe sometimes our bodies just need an extra little boost to produce it, and I want to give it a try to regulate myself. My brother accidently got me the extra-strength 5mg ones, and I want to start off slow, does cutting them in half…

With some suggestions on here, I've decided to give out where I post all my poems and crappy drawings (XD I'm gettig better.).

My name is jesd2 on devaintart.com

Here is a link http://jesd2.deviantart.com/.

I post a bunch of poems, besides MD.

XD This blog post, is really short.

    A few weeks ago I had a neurological exam. My therapist suggested it because she thought it was possible that I had Obsessive Complusive Disorder or was on the Autism Spectrum. I honestly thought that I wouldn't recieve a diagnosis. Yesterday my mom told me I was diagnosed with Asperger's, O.C.D, Depressive Disorder, and one that she wants to find more about before she tells me (which is very concerning to me).How does someone walk out of a three hour appointment with four…

Ever hear that phrase? "It's just my OCD." Honestly, I've always hated that phrase. People say it all the time, but don't really understand that the little quirk they are describing as "OCD" is actually known as an Idiosyncrasy. 

The difference…

I'm new and would love some help getting around this site!

I never knew there was a community for 'dreamers' out there. Glad I found a group! :]

My house-mates and I sat down last night to have a "Star Wars" marathon... and I got bored with it very quickly. Just not my thing I guess. (However it is quite long!) But we did finish the last episode just now... and I did see that to the end.

I'm finding it really hard to be interested in films these days. And I'm worried that my MD world has taken over my ability to enjoy good movies. Or even TV for that matter. My friends start watching something, then I get bored, and go into my…

Old, heavy and sense-deprived

Time slips by as sand between the fingers

Then it slows to a drone

The part I am acting

I know not of another part to act.

Held closed by fear

For years the old stones and pearls

In the withering box.

When a wind of obsession comes flying through the box

I can’t help but catch it.

And keep it for years in this old box.

A self-sabotage is what it is.

So, I know it's pretty typical for MDers to have music be a trigger for them, in fact it seems that the greater part of the majority is this way. Today I was listening to some good ol' tunes while daydreaming and it got me thinking about how the music is used. See, this is kind of embarrassing as I don't know how it triggers you guys but, for me, my characters usually are singing the songs themselves. Not like it's HighSchoolMusical Revised or anything, but most of them play in…