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Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest

Jessica Ballantyne Female Oakville, Ontario Canada: Like

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Quiet Worlds vs. Loud Realities

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Aug 2. 3 Replies 0 Likes

This might sound dumb

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Jul 16. 2 Replies 0 Likes

I was a young woman full of vigour, hopes, and visions, but I was too elated and excited for my very own good, in a sense. Life was starting out, but I wasn't very mature and responsible towards it—I…Continue

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Jessica Ballantyne posted a discussion

Emotions

I get carried away with my emotions when it comes to music. Most sensible people block it out, and get on with their day. Regards, I find that songs get inside my head and excite my mind into an escapism and I nearly lose the present moment, like songs actually feed my MD. It's the powerful singing voices and symphony that moves my imagination, and it boosts my mood and races my thought process. Regards I've been caught doing this! Or at least they can hear what comes out of my mouth when I get…See More

Thursday

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Jessica Ballantyne replied to Martino's discussion My daydreaming has reduced

"Thank you! On another topic. This is so embarrassing...but anyone can tell that I'm not here. They can figure out that I'm wandering, by my appearance and actions. Even the fact I'm not listening, nor responding. Lots of people…"

Wednesday

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Martino's discussion My daydreaming has reduced

"I just hope I can find someone who is that supportive too. "

Wednesday

Jessica Ballantyne posted a blog post

Relationships, where are they?

I get that real life doesn't look like our fantasies—but I'm angry, not particularly at that fact. What stirs me up is that I refused to be honest with myself for 40 years..that real life doesn't align with the fictional stories running in my mind. I did have faith that I can find a friend or partner who understands that this is who I am. But, I never managed to find someone whose stuck around to get to know me better, or accepted me, no matter what I do. The only person in my life who cares…See More

Tuesday

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Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion Quiet Worlds vs. Loud Realities

"I'm just feeling a bit sore. I was a youth once, and I was a cloud-walker. A person in their own world. I went around thinking I could be someone I just wasn't, and it always got me into trouble. I was entitled or felt I deserved to get…"

Aug 2

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion Quiet Worlds vs. Loud Realities

"Thank you. Your advice is very generous, and sensitive. I'm sure I will find people who care. "

Jul 31

AdministratorValeria Franco replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion Quiet Worlds vs. Loud Realities

"it may be just true, you may be surrounded by insensitive people...... but imaginary people, unluckily, aren't the solution. There are real people who care. You just need to find them. Easier said than done, of course. But please,…"

Jul 31

Jessica Ballantyne posted a discussion

Quiet Worlds vs. Loud Realities

My fictional characters happen to be so much nicer in my imagination. I'm struggling with my health, so I tend to feel very uncomfortable and stressed about it, where I needs medication and relaxation. In real life, I feel that I'm surrounded by people who don't understand how I'm doing...and they'll say and do whatever around me, which might induce my discomfort and make me feel pressured. I don't really communicate much, so it's over their comprehension how an area of my body feels, or how…See More

Jul 31

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Jessica Ballantyne replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion This might sound dumb

"Thanks Valerie, that's a good response, yes many just don't get it. "

Jul 16

AdministratorValeria Franco replied to Jessica Ballantyne's discussion This might sound dumb

"Dear Jessica, I feel you. And I think you shouldn't take all the responsibility of not having done enough experience. It's true, even introverts need a social life, and not staying in their room all the time. Lonely and alone are two…"

Jul 16

Jessica Ballantyne posted a discussion

This might sound dumb

This might sound dumb. I was a shy kid who had trouble bonding with people and making friends. I really should've taken drama, and now I regret it. I basically sat myself out on opportunities and experiences, but by accident. I wasn't a social butterfly, and always made attempts to be socially active, by enrolling in classes, playing sports, taking programs, hitting cafes and bars, and going to weekend events. Otherwise, I spent excessive amounts of time in my room, sitting all by myself on my…See More

Jul 13

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Jessica Ballantyne replied to Martino's discussion My daydreaming has reduced

"Does your girlfriend know that you daydream? I don't even have to mention anything, people guess, because I kind of freeze and stare. "

Jul 13

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Poppy_ᕦ⁠ʕ⁠ ⁠•⁠ᴥ⁠•⁠ʔ⁠ᕤ's discussion Maladaptive daydreaming is taking over my life

"I understand your feelings on missing out on life's opportunities and relationships. I just turned 40, but regret how much time I lost to maladaptive daydreaming. Currently, I feel alone and shut out from the world—because I allowed it…"

Jul 7

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Evelyn Lowery's discussion My journey with MD

"I know what it feels like to be in your shoes. We hold a special gift and like to invision ideas in our heads, but to everyone else, its like we're from outer space. They get disgruntled that we are not with them, and wonder why. They even…"

Jul 5

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Evelyn Lowery's discussion My journey with MD

"So he didn't understand, but he still treated you well, you were his wife. My situation is gag-worthy. I couldn't hide my MD situation from anybody, because I am neurodivergent, so my quirky body language gave it off. Since I was a…"

Jul 3

Jessica Ballantyne replied to Evelyn Lowery's discussion My journey with MD

"I know, it's actually kind of sad. I think I ruined my life being an MD'er—while it told me it would get better. I wonder if I never went into relationships, even marriage, all because of this. It's like I shot myself in…"

Jul 2

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Jessica Ballantyne's Blog

Relationships, where are they?

Posted on August 4, 2026 at 6:56am 0 Comments 0 Likes

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Parasocial Relationships

Posted on February 16, 2026 at 10:01am 2 Comments 2 Likes

I tend to admire public figures and their families online, but feel that I have parasocial relationships with them. They have no idea that I think about them everybody and always reviewing their instagram platforms, videos, articles, and websites. I then start to fantasize that I am their friend and we know each other, whereas in real life, who knows how they'd react if we've ever actually met. Well I'd been a fan of this singer and learned all about their wife & daughter,…

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Present in Body, Elsewhere in Thought

Posted on January 27, 2026 at 9:02am 1 Comment 1 Like

I see that not everybody has my brain...and they're not me...but, I feel like whenever I'm around people, I got so embarrassed or burned. It does depend on the social group, but I happen to be around people who don't know what to make of me, and can't put a finger on what I'm doing in my head...to block out the their words.

I'll be blunt. I've had a lot of people respond to me in a way, they think I'm suddenly off in another universe or they're figure I'm suddenly someplace…

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25 Years in a Daydream: The Cost of Silence

Posted on November 5, 2025 at 1:19pm 1 Comment 0 Likes

This may sound obvious to many daydreamers. I started MD when I was 12, and wish that I talked with my parents about my daydreaming disorder immediately when it started to make me laugh for nothing around everyone. It would've saved me the next 25 years of turmoil. Saying this, I daydreamed thickly through my teens, 20's and maybe regularly in my 30's.

My grades were bare passes and I made lousy decisions towards my future, which I eventually regretted.

In the…

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At 11:40pm on March 21, 2021, Deep blue said…: Hey do you mind if I ask what kinda job do you do Rn? I'm still a student and I've always wondered what people like us, who have MD, do when they grow up.

At 12:55pm on February 22, 2021, Varya said…: Hi. You can write to me as well, just in case. You seem like a nice and interesting person. varvaraamarantha@gmail.com

At 5:22pm on February 15, 2021, Raul said…: hi, if you want to talk, this is my email, i can hear you, talk to a person who goes through the same situation helps. raulvasconcelosb@gmail.com