Jessica Ballantyne
  • Female
  • Oakville, Ontario
  • Canada
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Jessica Ballantyne's Discussions

Digging myself in deep with daydreaming

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Feb 17. 2 Replies

Unsure if I was foolish towards life. I'm a neurodivergent who is naturally a daydreamer from birth. I always wanted a life of friends and relationships that never was. Well, I seem to affect people…Continue

MD and Real Life's responses

Started this discussion. Last reply by The1andonlyAbber Feb 20. 5 Replies

Has maladaptive daydreaming gave you so much hope and assures you things. But real life keeps biting back you in the ass—like fuck? It throws you off guard to an extent you're mad at yourself for…Continue

Coping

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Feb 20. 6 Replies

I used to cope with my loneliness by doing MD—but it strikes me, if I hadn't started MD and learned to socialize like people do, even if it means watching them, I probably would've been a happier…Continue

Lost Hopes

Started this discussion. Last reply by Jessica Ballantyne Oct 31, 2023. 3 Replies

Crazy as it sounds. I slept, worked and dwelled in a bedroom for 31 years since I was 6. Never moved out, was never professionally successful. Crazier, I never experienced having a real relationship…Continue

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Jessica Ballantyne's Page

Latest Activity

Jessica Ballantyne replied to farrahfawn's discussion utilizing daydreams for good?
"I don't speak German. If I daydreamed while I studied, I wouldn't have passed. I need to absorb information properly. "
Monday
Jessica Ballantyne replied to farrahfawn's discussion utilizing daydreams for good?
"Same with me. It does become a big problem when I'm in stressful situations and have to focus. My muscles think and seize, and I can't act up, then my MD gets out of control. "
Monday
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"HI, I keep on getting your daily routines in my email. Is there a way to dismiss myself in this blog. "
Apr 9
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"How's progress? I see you keep a daily log. "
Apr 4
Jessica Ballantyne replied to farrahfawn's discussion utilizing daydreams for good?
"I feel like people "shut me out" because I don't talk so much, and interact with them properly. I don't realize that I burn them up.Then they acknowledge this is who I am, and it ruins our bond. Then they get all mean and we…"
Apr 2
Jessica Ballantyne replied to Sara's discussion Symptoms after daydreaming
"Yeah, my MD is better, but it did something to my body. I didn't reconcile that I spent 14 years slumped over a desk at my computer, working online. It is hell rolling out of bed in the morning. I get severe sleep inertia that lasts for hours.…"
Apr 1
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"I do feel MD just did me damage, over any good. "
Mar 29
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"How I am working on the floor is starting to worry me. I'm not receptive, vigilant and sharp as a thistle according to what is around me and in front of me. Somebody once called me a "zoner." I'm afraid somebody is going to…"
Mar 28
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"Staying focused on everyday pursuits, my attention really needed me, especially when it came to work. I work at a cash register at a retail store, and there can be a rush of customers. I have to be a fast learner and got to see what I'm doing.…"
Mar 24
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"Same with me! It massively impacted my growth and development! I'm shocked. You think MD assures your future will ROCK. When really it's doing the opposite for you. I'm in my late 30's, but I carry on like a kid! I don't…"
Mar 24
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"I'm glad to hear you are making progress. I almost got out of MD successfully, but I feel it effected my growth and development, also my concentration and attainment. I wonder if I'll ever be the same. "
Mar 24
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"I feel that MD really pulled me away from the things I wanted....it was a coping mechanism, and yet it wasn't. I really made my life even worse. And it tore me away from having relationships with anyone—even my own family. I just…"
Mar 22
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"MD actually hurt me. It lied to me. It told me what I wanted to hear. Tough part is I believed what it was saying to me. Meanwhile, I wasn't listening to people's valuable advice. I just kept sliding down the slope. I got my…"
Mar 20
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"I think I got too carried away with the fantasies, but didn't watch where my life was heading and I drifted out of touch with it. I'm sorry I did this, I am way behind in life now. This also impacted a lot of people who met me. I have so…"
Mar 19
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"It does relieve us, but also, it distracts us from life. Putting us down a road we don't want to be. In the end, it's very regrettable and soul crushing. What makes me so mad is when I started MD, everything felt like GOLD. I had…"
Mar 18
Jessica Ballantyne replied to trapmoneyslim's discussion I am going to quit MD for good.
"Ok, I take that back. It's not too late. But it did do some damage andI wasted a lot of years. I wish that I stopped, and thought hard about exactly what the hell I think I'm doing. But I was young and frivolous back then, so I…"
Mar 18

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Jessica Ballantyne's Blog

Outside my head

Posted on June 4, 2021 at 1:26pm 990 Comments

This is going to sound annoying. Living in a town for 29 years, all I ever heard by others is that I'm so quiet. They literally couldn't get a word out of me. I was too busy daydreaming in my head to realize how I looked on the outside. I actually never knew it made me look stupid. Non-family can be vigorous that way. I always used MD as a way to escape my frustrations, but it did me more harm that good, so I had to quit. It was the best decision I made. 



What…

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Friends are not from Dreams

Posted on May 18, 2021 at 4:47pm 10 Comments

I spent my whole life looking forward to friends and relationships, and this actually could've happened, if I wasn't living on another planet. When I was a kid, I used to ponder around my room and other parts of the house, imagining situations of how I could meet young people in my area. I'd stand in our shady family office, looking at drawings and poetry, wishing that friends would suddenly pop out of nowhere and say hi. All I had to do was talk to my classmates, get their phone…

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In a Maze

Posted on April 19, 2021 at 4:40pm 4 Comments

When I was doing MD, I thought it was awesome. It lulled me into complacency and I'd spend hours staring away into a fuge, with glowing hopes things will eventually go my way. Unfortunately, it dug me into a deeper hole. Nobody knew my satisfaction as I have, but they didn't understand why my eyes had a distant stare, why I moved funny, didn't talk much and why I almost wasn't ever listening. It clearly proved to them that I was in another world. To myself, I believed I can do…

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Putting myself in one's shoes

Posted on April 12, 2021 at 7:09pm 2 Comments

I tend to be inspired by people from movies and TV series, and often wish I had their lives and personas. I know  for sure that I'm not those characters. I don't have their skill sets, minds, looks and their coolness. I work remotely at home, and it can be very boring, so sometimes I imagine myself as a doctor or computer programmer in a science fiction action film. 



Sometimes when I get out there and do what I like, it's still a challenge, because I'm an extremely quiet…

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Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 11:40pm on March 21, 2021, Sakshee Dhumal said…

Hey do you mind if I ask what kinda job do you do Rn? I'm still a student and I've always wondered what people like us, who have MD, do when they grow up.

At 12:55pm on February 22, 2021, Varya said…
Hi. You can write to me as well, just in case. You seem like a nice and interesting person. varvaraamarantha@gmail.com
At 5:22pm on February 15, 2021, Raul said…
hi, if you want to talk, this is my email, i can hear you, talk to a person who goes through the same situation helps. raulvasconcelosb@gmail.com
 
 
 

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