Where wild minds come to rest
EDIT: I looked it up, and I have an anxiety disorder. MD was covering it up, like a camouflage, while also comforting me. I won't erase this post, but it looks like the problem isn't MD anymore at all. I have another problem that tempts me to seek comfort in DD again. But I can now control MD, and I will face my anxiety problem face-on...just like I did with MD itself! It is the one important thing that my daydreams taught me how to do :)
I will probably write only another…Continue
Hi again! I hope the new year started beautifully for all of you :)
I'm making progress in rooting myself to reality, and it's still like a whole new world to me! I keep forgetting rules of the imaginary don't apply here, that everything is changeable and imperfect. However, good things have a way bigger worth in the real world. And I would never change valuable, real feelings for any DD ones! They have a much stronger, richer flavor, that cannot be easily…Continue
Added by Gina Black on January 4, 2013 at 6:30pm — No Comments
Happy new year, everyone!!! :D
Double celebration for me: one month since I escaped MD!
I am still confused sometimes: it feels like having a wall at the back of my brain, that doesn't let me think clearly. And when I say "I feel" it's not a metaphor, it feels solid and has been bugging me for years. I even wondered if it is a brain problem. But, recently, there are moments when this block is lifted and, suddenly, reality becomes interesting. My brain functions on a…Continue
It's been 3 weeks since I escaped MD, and I keep having the upper hand (yay!) Because I now know how to avoid being stuck in an infinite DD. Writing this Blog -and you, guys- have helped me veeeeeeeeeeery much to get this far! (If you're thinking of making a blog yourselves, do it! I wholeheartedly recommend it! It's great for keeping track of your progress, and getting comments from people that can understand)
my "older self" is still…Continue
But is this really the end of the journey? The end of the fight?
No, it isn't. Because being able to control it doesn't mean you can easily adapt to the new lifestyle-the one called "real life". Let's face it, the imaginary world is the place we know well, the place that's most comfortable and easy for us to be. But we know we can have more than that, right guys? :D
By escaping I have gained the ability to stay freely in the real world, for…Continue
Added by Gina Black on December 6, 2012 at 2:30pm — No Comments
Hello again. It's been a while.
You remember my imaginary friend, Mary the monkey? The one who I need to unerstand in order to "get the last keys" of the MD labyrinth's exit?
I'll tell you a fairytale I wrote years ago, long before "meeting" Mary. The fairytale of Lupita and her keyholder monkey. (I'll be relatively brief though-it would take days for the exact translation!)
Our story begins with a girl called Lupita.
Lupita lived in a…Continue
Gosh, I hope I'll find time to read your blogs soon...I've missed you guys! My new lifestyle's driving me crazy, I am writing this post at 4 in the morning...so forgive any sleep-deprived grammar :p
So, by now I have climbed out of the dream abyss, made it through the labyrinth of distorting mirrors, explored the jungle of lost desires and, finally, got myself in one piece at the end of the road.
Well, almost in one piece. Because there seems to be…Continue
Ah, I haven't been here for some time. But I haven't been much into DD, either. My life has been too fast-paced the last week: I'm changing house-and life.
I have good news: my plans worked, and I seem to be cured!!! I've found most of my poisonous triggers. I've unburried major desires, major parts of my personality, and took steps to bring them into my real life. This calmed down my overactive imagination.
For example, I got in an arts team, in the city I just moved…Continue
Synopsis up to now: I have escaped the lullaby of my deepest daydreams. I kept struggling to find my way, and currently I'm quite vigilant in real life. However, I'm still chained to the dreamworld and the power it has over me. To fully escape I need to recover certain pieces of myself, and expose them to the real world. Pieces I burried in the dreamworld, in order to keep them safe, when I were still young and fragile. Every piece coming into light is one chain less. Let's see how this…Continue
My progress has been great so far. I've climbed out of the dreamcave's depths, using little tricks and willpower. I am way less absent-minded, and can observe reality almost as well as "normal people". I am so close to the exit...
And yet can't get out.
I just don't know how to live outside MD. It has been defining me for life. I have ways to deal with reality, but my system is lacking: and the reason is simple. I've been always living in Dreamland, and…Continue
Last week I've experimented with 1-2 tricks from the forums (both happen to be John K's).
What helps me daydream less is to immediately look at some object that is in the room and imagine I have fired an arrow at it from my daydream in my head out my eyes into the object I am looking at in reality. It causes my attention to…
When you get what you want, the daydreams weaken.
After my "graduation" I got money and sex a boyfriend and a job: I wanted both for a long time and, naturally, they were anti-MD motivation. So I improved a lot during 2011/12. I also achieved things I never could before.
Example: I had social phobia, but my job was to sell things. Bad match! But I had learned a trick online: creating an imaginary shield that…Continue
So that's what's going on in my head! At last, I know!
...But I still have MD. It can't magically disappear just because I know. Damn!
Probably sounds familiar, right? I'm on the correct escaping path, but my brain is still a mess. I need to organize it. So...I am going to write down my progress. You are probably the only people who can understand me, so if you feel that something's off, feel free to call me crazy (it's better if I…Continue