Escaping wonderland (illusions broken)

[Gina Black]

When you get what you want, the daydreams weaken.

After my "graduation" I got  money and sex a boyfriend and a job: I wanted both for a long time and, naturally, they were anti-MD motivation. So I improved a lot during  2011/12. I also achieved things I never could before. 

Example: I had social phobia, but my job was to sell things. Bad match! But I had learned a trick online: creating an imaginary shield that protects you from peoples' negativeness (the simplest way of describing it...) As long as your brain thinks it works, it is natural that you'll feel safer and more confident. So I wore my imaginary armor and went out there, started having fun soon, and were even promoted to a trainer. (Note: concentrating on the shield stopped my brain from DDing further, too. I had my MD under control)

But outside work or romance I were still into MD. I thought that wasting time didn't matter, I thought I had everything.

Next thing I knew, everything was in ruins. Family problems made me to leave my beloved home and my work. And broke up with my sweetheart too. And had great problems of other sorts... University failures, friends choosing the wrong  turn in life... I wasn't strong enough to cope with all that, because of my MD.

If only I had been more attentive!

"That's enough", I thought, and decided I REALLY have to find my place in the real world. 

Only... I had no idea what to do.  Randomly, I started trying to connect the real world with the imaginary one, in order to understand both better.

Because of that, I soon found out about MD and this site.

That was salvation!  Naming the problem is often part of the solution, as you know exactly what to fight for. Words do have power. So, now I know the "enemy", and my real fight has begun.

[taffle]

Yeah, I think what happens is sometimes, reality hits you so hard in the face that it jerks you away from the MD world and you realize how much your real life is in shambles.

[greyartist]

That makes sense. If our DDs are telling us what we subconciously want, when we get it the DD should stop. I would think, then go on to something else.