Amanda Lynne's Blog – May 2012 Archive (6)

Acceptance. (Kind of:)

 I've been doing a lot of thinking. When people use the word "introvert" to describe me, I get really sensitive. Why are words like "weird" and "introverted" negative to most people (myself)? I'm starting to see a positive side to it.

 

  Don't get me wrong, the maladaptive daydreaming has got to stop. I don't think I could ever see it as a positive thing for me, maladaptive means counterproductive. Daydreaming, just daydreaming every now and then and letting your imagination…

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Added by Amanda Lynne on May 26, 2012 at 10:56am — 2 Comments

"Falling from cloud nine, crashing from the high."

Today wasn't the best. My third day at driver's ed, the last two were fine, nothing big, but today during our thirty minute break I kinda stood alone awkwardly, and I had two so called friends who just passed me up and then I saw them pointing at me and laughing and it made me mad and broke my heart. Eventually I went to sit next to my other friend, which I didn't want to cause I felt like I was annoying her, but I didn't wanna stand alone anymore. So I sat next to her and she didn't seem…

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Added by Amanda Lynne on May 25, 2012 at 3:23pm — 4 Comments

Selfish Daydreamer?

  I was doing great daydreaming, and I gave myself a little time to daydream and I couldn't stop for two days. I blew off my family, barely paid attention to my friends on the last days of school, and almost got ran over because I can't get out my stupid little fantasy.

 

  People say (I have said before) that you should give yourself a set time to daydream but if I do then I can't stop and it's so hard to get back in that motivated mind set for me, once I've…

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Added by Amanda Lynne on May 18, 2012 at 3:40pm — 8 Comments

Emptiness.

Lately, I've been getting better at controlling myself and not daydreaming all the time.

 

But I'm surprised at how depressed I get. Is it like a withdrawal thing... has anyone else dealt with this? It's like if you're not daydreaming you're forced to face real life, and real life isn't the happiest thing for someone who's daydreamed their life away. It really empties me, like I don't have much to think about.

Added by Amanda Lynne on May 15, 2012 at 4:52pm — 5 Comments

Some of my techniques :)

So, I've been going to the doctor, gettin' tested for ADD and all that, and I'm still waiting for the results. Have to admit, I'd be really excited to get some "focus medicine" but I know at the end of the day, that stuff wears off and I have to have some kinda inner will power.

 

Sooo, here's some of the stuff I do to keep from daydreaming:

 

1)I get P.O'd

Sounds weird, but I do and it helps. Not at myself, at whatever's making me daydream. I kinda kick it…

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Added by Amanda Lynne on May 14, 2012 at 3:31pm — 4 Comments

Confusion.

That word sums up life right now. Confused, overwhelmed, and hopeless. That's how it feels.

I went to a therpist this week, she was nice, she said all my goals were acheivable but I don't think she understands. How hard it is to stop. I hate mental disorders. I used to want to be a therapist and now I just hate everything about social science and psychology. I hate anything that puts emotions and personalities to a science. Like "if you're shy or anxious and don't have friends, you…

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Added by Amanda Lynne on May 4, 2012 at 4:03pm — No Comments

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