I've never been myself. I've always been whoever was the main character of my DD. I don't think I ever developed a stable personality and now that I'm losing my ability to DD I am constantly having to re-evaluate  who I am. I feel like I lost myself along with my daydreams.  I don't know how to act anymore. I don't know how to dress anymore. I don't know who I am and I hate it. 

I'm going to talk to my psychiatrist about this, but I don't see her for an entire month. I wish I'd never…

I guess this is just a rant.

My doctor put me on Abilify to stop my daydreams or delusions as she calls them. I hate it. My head feels so empty. I can't think at all. I miss my world and I know that I shouldn't want it so bad, but I do.  If I don't have my world, I don't have a life. I don't have real friends. I don't have the freedom to go out and do things like I do in my daydreams. Without my daydreams, my depression has gotten so much worse. I just feel empty.

I can't tell…