Memories

[Fallen Messenger]

     I have been a maladaptive daydreamer my whole life...or ever since I could remember. But honestly, I don't remember much. I have close to zero recollection of my childhood. I don't remember last week hardly at all. I have wonderful short term memory, kinda. I remember important things like eating, sleeping, and going to school. But I don't have any memory of little things. I will set my phone down and walk away, I come back in a frantic search to find my phone because I don't remember where I put it.

     I don't have any inspiring words of how you can "overcome" it this time. Sorry, but I want your responses. Does anyone else have the worst memory? If so, do you have a story to tell? I'd love to hear it.

Anyways, I do have a theory (some habits don't change). I believe that since we have to remember two lives and have one brain, we subconsciously choose to forget the real world to leave room to remember our beloved fantasy world. This makes sense to me because I can clearly remember nearly all my daydreams, but I don't hardly remember the real world.

     I want your opinion. Does the same thing happen to you? Does it make sense? It's just a theory, but there might be some truth behind it.

[MatthewR]

Yes, I agree. I keep drifting into a fantasy that drains me of energy i could be spending in real life. My memory is also terrible, and i often find myself double-checking, triple-checking simple things because i can't remember the details. I struggle with naming things and finding the right words to speak. Idk why...I just draw a blank and can't remember. I'm also taken aback by how little i can remember of the past few years. It all seems blurry to me...what was i doing? What did i accomplish? It's a bit terrifying actually.  

[Eretaia]

People remember feelings. No feelings, no memories. 

[Source]

In order to remember something, you need to actually give a damn about it. If you don't, you'll forget. Can't help but wonder how many times people have complained about me not remembering what they told me, with the reason ultimately being a rephrasing of "I remembered it as long as I felt I needed to". If we stuffed our head with every single detail of everything that happened, our skulls would blow up.

Then of course you have MDD, which makes for a disturbingly exacerbated case of that. We retreat into the dream world because for one reason or the other we want nothing to do with the real one. Why the hell should I give a flying kek (and thus remember stuff) about a world I'd sooner see off the table? And so years feel like seconds when you look back at them. The distorted, nonlinear timeline of the dream world certainly doesn't help with that, either.

[Joshua Wayne]

I'm 28 years old and just finally figured out rumination and manipulative daydreaming fit me. I always knew I was different just didn't know what it was. My memory is terrible as well. Lose my phone, keys, wallet. Tools. All kinds of things. Due to not paying attention while I'm doing things also while I'm talking to myself in my mind.