Without MD I would not be alive

[SJ]

It's a double edge sword. MD has stopped me pushing forward in life and doing things as it can take away days but without I truly do believe I would not be here today.
It shields me or hides my depression from me.
I have felt suicidal in the past and somehow it has pulled me through I imagine happiness and friendships and love but then when reality bites I realise MD maybe causing my depression getting me to stay in and not socialise unless necessary like work.
I want to give up and live but I'm too scared that if I give it up completely I will be unable to cope with the reality of working long hours, no friends and feeling alone and worthless.

[JenBren]

I love the metaphor: MD is both a shield and a sword. I too believe my MD has saved me in a sense. Certainly, I would be in a much darker place without it. In a life where I am so busy, consumed by things I HAVE to do (as opposed to things I WANT to do), MD has been the only thing at times that has kept me going. It's a chance to escape my life on days I just can't take anymore. 

I know it's not the way to cope, but it's a coping mechanism nonetheless, and one I've used as far back as I can remember. That being said, we cannot let it consume our lives. It may be a sword and a shield, but it's a double edged sword. 

[Fallen Messenger]

MD really is both a shield and a sword. When I first found out about MD I almost pulled the trigger, but this site saved me, heck, my MD saved me. So I feel ya bud, after all, MD is an addiction we've all become a little but too dependent on to get through our lives.