Something I found on the internet

[Kal]

Hi! I just found this on Reddit. And I really​ liked it so I thought that I'd share it. I'm not an optimist usually. But I'm trying to break that shell. (Sometimes you see something really glorious like sometimes in the evening the sun makes everything golden and the asphalt looks really beautiful.)

There are some roads that are closed off from you forever
There was a life that you could have lived, but no longer

But this is the life you have. This is the life you chose with every decision you made. Those alternate lives aren't real, they're hopeful imaginations that don't include all the negative things that would have happened had you lived those lives instead.

Possibilities being closed off are inevitable, you can't do and be everything. All you can do is ask yourself if you're living the way that makes the most sense to you now. But if you're not, then change something for the better.

Don't torture yourself with "what if". There is no "what if", the time has passed. There is only what is, and you're not maximising the potential of what is by imagining what wasn't.

[goner]

i find i can't really connect with this, considering almost all my daydreams are dark and have some form of pain in them. all my characters ever go through is hard times. 

[Source]

You know why we never consider all the crap that comes prepackaged with whatever life we imagine? Among our evolutionary traits is aversion to pain, because when we were monkeys with sticks pain was bad for our health and we had to avoid it in order to survive. This instinct of avoiding pain, however, doesn't only mean that we will try to dodge a spear thrown at us, it means that we will try to avoid any kind of pain in any way possible, which means leaving it - and its causes and consequences - out of any scenarios we come up with. We are literally made to avoid pain.

[MatthewR]

Very true. Its easy to imagine the possibilities, but we don't always consider the setbacks, losses, or painful experiences of choosing those alternate lives. Sometimes a way of life demands a certain kind of toughness and perseverance. It's not impossible to have that kind of lifestyle we see in our heads, but it takes work and resilience. It's also important to accept when a path is no longer open. There are other ways and people you will meet, so it's never really the end of the world, either. Accepting what is allows you to move forward. Thanks Kal!