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Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest

Is Anyone Else Depressed After Daydreaming?

Hi everyone,

I'm Jennifer and am 20 years old. I must have joined this site when I was about 14-15 years old and have not visited it in a few years. I am glad to see it is still here.

I used to daydream every single night. I started a plot with characters when I was about 8 years old...I am almost 21 now and am still using the same story line and characters. Rather than daydreaming every night like my old habits when I was in middle and high school, I daydream only a few times a month now.

I had a question for you all: Last night I daydreamed for 4 continuous hours for the first time in weeks, and when I woke up this morning I was extremely depressed that my daydreams are not my real life. I actually cried quite a few times at work today because I was so distraught over this. It has never affected me quite this bad, but I really seemed to realize how lonely and isolated I am in real life. In my head, I am everything I've always wanted to be. In real life, I'm still working on myself. And in my head, I have at least 6 other girl friends...In real life, I have none.

I have just been so depressed about this all day. Has MDD ever affected any of you like this before?

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Comment by Aseel on February 19, 2018 at 5:27am: I feel the same;I am walking towards my goals steadily however I feel there’s something missing in my life and I feel terribly depressed and then I force myself into a daydream however I can’t rarely find peace and comfort in daydreams as I used to be.In fact it’s difficult for me to even daydream lately.Most of the time I am depressed,anxious or lonely.I can rarely feel peaceful about anything although there were times when I used to feel blissfully peaceful

Comment by Jennifer on February 16, 2018 at 3:15pm: Matthew R, thank you so much! You are so sweet. It has been years since I have been on this site. Real life got extremely busy, and actually pretty difficult, so some time went by before I logged back in. One day I came back here and tried to get back onto this site, but the site was shut down. :( I am so happy to see that it is back, as well as the fact that you're still here!

I am really sorry that you can relate to what I posted...it really is a difficult way to go through life. MDD really does make everything harder, just as you said. Social anxiety is already a struggle, but when I have these expectations of how I want people and friendships to be in my head, I get highly disappointed when they don't always go that way in real life. Hang in there, my friend.

Comment by Jennifer on February 16, 2018 at 3:13pm: Thank you all so much for your lovely responses to my cry for help. Reading all of your comments truly allows me to feel less alone and isolated. I feel so misunderstood by the rest of the world...No one, not even my therapist, understands how difficult off a disorder MDD really is, or even what it really is.

Comment by MatthewR on February 10, 2018 at 6:13pm: Wow! Jennifer, wb! I didn't recognize you at first. You have a completely new look! I looked at your profile pic and thought, 'this person looks incredibly familiar, where have i....?' And then I suddenly realized you were the same Jennifer from years ago, and my mouth literally dropped. Like, you completely transformed. I love your colors. Black, blacker, and blackest is my fave. And how about that tattoo?? Very nice!!

But about your question. Yes, I certainly feel depressed after daydreaming, but it's been a while since I've really indulged in a fantasy like that. There used to be days when I couldn't even get out of bed. I totally sympathize with you, tho. I feel terribly fake around others, like I might as well be an alien, because I'm all alone and just pretending to fit in. MDD just makes everything worse.

Comment by Kitt Coltrane on February 5, 2018 at 8:03am: Hi! I was wondering what event happened that made you start daydreaming more? Usually, for me, I have something that triggers me or makes me feel needful of excitemen.

Comment by Aziz Seyidov on February 1, 2018 at 5:18am: Also, it's important to keep engaging yourself in all kinds of real life activities and relationship. It will help you to divert your attention from DD and suppress it whenever it arises. For example, doing creative things, doesn't matter what, any creative activity which you like doing. We have to accept one fact that it won't be possible to get rid of MDD 100% because it's neurological problem and no therapy no drugs in the world will help. It's something you have to fight yourself and by yourself. We can control it and divert it to something less harmful, we can vaporize it to pieces every time it arises. For example, whenever I feel that DD is coming I do exercise, like push ups, chin up or any exercise you would like, and therefore converting negative energy of DD into positive energy.

Anyway, I've talked a lot now.

Comment by Aziz Seyidov on February 1, 2018 at 5:02am: Agree, it's hard to to find a genuine individuals. Yes, MDD is destructive and depressing, but same time it has one good side that is it makes you compassionate and sensitive toward other people since there's no ego or self in you. From my personal observation and I've tested it many times, the best way to slow down or stop DMM is keep constantly reminding to yourself of devastating consequence of it. I mean, the moment DD arised just quickly remind yourself what negative effects you had last time as result of daydreaming. It will put you off and also will create fear factor and that fear of going through same pain will be more powerful then DD. I don't know if I make sense, English is not my first language. But we can discuss it here and I can elaborate more on that.

Comment by Aziz Seyidov on January 31, 2018 at 3:29am: Yes, it's depressing when you come back to reality because I think the reality in itself is depressing as well in this modern world. All the relationships between people are artificial and egocentric. This is just my option, maybe I'm too pessimistic.

Comment by OhMyMagenta on January 26, 2018 at 7:35pm: Oh Absolutely! I’ve been moved to tears on many occasions after daydreaming. It’s jarring to come back to reality.

Comment by Jae on January 26, 2018 at 12:47pm: I feel for you.

I started around 11 years old.

Falling to the floor, after pacing for hours, is more psychologically painful than physical.

When I come back to reality, I'm reminded of the feeling that there is nothing here for me.

I'm trying to work on becoming better, but there's no doubt that it hurts.