Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
Hmmm... I try to stay disconnected from my daydream characters at all costs. Mainly because they aren't me and I don't want to have them grow on me to the point where I can't kill them off in my day dream. I believe there are two types of dreamers: the ones who see a better version of themselves and their lives, and the ones who make up 100% fantasy stories.
Maybe this is a useful way to use your daydream. If you feel better, why not?
I have never done it, but I wish I had a way to cope with stressful situations.
Actually I don't have a real alter ego in my daydreams, so I have no name to wisper. In my dreams me it's always me, but all the rest is different, better... But if you have another you, an alter ego, you can "become" it or let it influence positively your life... if you can think "what would my alter ego do in this situation"...daydreams may be a useful tool for your life. Could it be?
I wish it could.
sometimes I whisper to myself, "who are you?" but I never really answer that, it's just something that feels really natural to say and think and sorta draws me back. All my daydreams are pretty big, with worlds and loads of different characters and stories, and I think I always feel really close to the main character who everything is happening to. There is this Stephen King/Peter Straub novel called the Talisman, where people have twinners who are sorta like versions of themselves but also different. I'm so different from all my others but I guess they give me ways to feel certain ways that are seperate from myself. They are like twinners of me, in some form or another.
No, but I'll sometimes ask myself when I'm really stressed 'what would Jack do?' Jack being my alter ego. Then I'll think back to a past daydream (I forget nothing) and remember a way that he dealt with something similar. If he hasn't dealt with anything similar, then I'll wait until I come home, play out a scenario as him, then know what to do next time. Sometimes I get angry cause I can't deal with situations as well as him and he's just...well...me...and other times it helps a lot. When I was younger and my dad was still alive I told him about this, and he said it was ok, and the same thing as someone asking God/Allah/Buddha/the stars/whatever you believe for guidance.
Of course, it works because Jack's enemies are controlled by me so when it gets too much I can just stop it, or have Jack punch them, or run to his friends and cry. But when I was a 10 year old with Autism trying to come up with ways of answering back kids who teased me or beat me up, Jack's predecessors - he came onto the scene when i was about 13 - really helped out. I could rehearse conversations, act out ways to stand 'calm' or 'natural.'
I've learned all that now so really my daydreams are an escape which just wont die off and I'm constantly relapsing (if it's not them, then I drink). Sigh. And Jack's life is not that fantastic anyway, in fact, it's pretty hopeless. I suppose I do it because I want to feel like there's someone out there who's like me, which is a massive craving I've felt since I was a child. Also it's cathartic to make him feel sad and lonely. The problems never stop!
Sorry, rambling on. Amity, I think it's quite normal, and a lot of people ask for 'guidance' from whoever. Sometimes I ask God, sometimes I ask my dad who's maybe up in the clouds somewhere, sometimes I ask my cat or my dog when he was alive, sometimes I ring my mum or a friend, sometimes I ask imaginary Jack.