Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 1 - I've been Maladaptive Daydreaming for over four years now, and I know that it's time to stop. I've recently been able to improve my life, but am facing some obstacles right now and want to clear my mind and focus on improvement. Today I spent a huge amount of time in depression and daydreaming, trying to escape my current circumstances and overlooking all the blessings in my life. I truly believe that all our lives have so much value, value beyond our imagination, and that we should try our hardest to recognize that value. So right now, I will take small steps, starting off by forgiving myself for all the mistakes I have made, and calmly take on whatever I need to do.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 49 - The past two days have been tough MD-wise, but I know I've been making progress compared to where I was at a few months back. I've generally had a lot of MD over these last couple days (more frequent after a social situation didn't go optimally), but overall I have still been able to step back and remind myself why I want to overcome MD.

Another reason to overcome MD:

I want to learn to love and accept myself--all parts of me--more. I'm not perfect, and I want to be able to love and accept myself for who I am, and become more comfortable in my own skin.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 51 - The past two days have had their ups and downs. They haven't been horrible MD-wise, but have been tough and have had periods of strong MD. I'm going to continue to remind myself of why I want to overcome MD and take time for self-reflection.

Another reason to overcome MD:

I want to be able to slowly break persistent bad habits and develop sustainable healthy habits in many areas of my life. The possibilities are endless, but I know that authentic change will demand my presence and drive. Overcoming MD, and having greater clarity of mind will definitely help me make some important habit shifts.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 54 - The last few days have had ups and downs MD-wise. Yesterday, after a workout, I was able to experience a relatively rare state of very low to no MD for a couple of hours. While I was going through my reps, I kept the intention of focusing on inner peace and overcoming MD in my mind, and afterwards I was able to carry that state through for a couple hours. I didn't get too much sleep last night, which somewhat cut at my productivity and increased the intensity of my MD.

Another reason to overcome MD:

I want to know what it's like to be present in the moment. Oftentimes when I have nothing to do, my mind tries hard to fill the void (and rather automatically) reverts to MD, dwelling on thoughts, or prompts me to do some sort of action. I do want to be able to reach a point where I can just sit with myself, be fully present/aware of the moment, and enjoy. I'm hoping that overcoming MD can help me to do so.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 55 - My MDs have been strong today, and I've had relatively low motivation, especially towards the morning. I'm going to continue to keep tabs on MD and keep pushing forward.

Another reason to overcome MD:

I want to stop worrying about what others think of me so much, and realize that the world doesn't revolve around me. The vast majority of my MDs tend to be self-centered, usually focusing on how others think I'm "so great". In real life, I want the freedom to be able to just be myself and enjoy being, and thoroughly understand that for the most part, other people aren't always thinking of me, that I can make mistakes and handle the consequences, that I don't have to be some perfect idealized character for others to look up to, and that I can just authentically be the best person I can be and enjoy the process.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 59 - These last few days have had their ups and downs MD-wise, though I've had periods of the day with fairly high MD. 

One observation -- If I have a very specific, concrete, immediate goal for what I need to do (either for the day or near future), my MD decreases.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 61 - This afternoon, I had a thick MD session. It was hard to get myself out, but ultimately exercising a bit helped do the trick.

MD Observation -- My mind is craving goals and purpose, and when I think they're meaningful and potentially achievable, they serve as an anchor to keep my mind from drifting away in MD.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 64  - Last few days have had fairly high MD. I want to overcome this, but sometimes I feel like I'm not making any measurable progress in the right direction. I need to look into finding new approaches.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 71 - I've had a good deal of MD over this past week. What helps curb the MD's to a certain extent is engaging in difficult tasks, pushing myself beyond my comfort zone, and working towards a larger purpose.

[maro]

Wish you life free of MDD Ulaan