Just when I think I'm coming out of MD, there are other signs that are still apparent. The other night, my family was watching TV and my sister noticed that I had a horrified expression on my face. I wasn't day dreaming, but I was thinking of something very serious. Whenever I'm deep in thought, it just bleeds out of my face. I've had random people and co-workers see me make all sorts of faces. Lately, my family does catch me talking to an 'invisible person' in the room, and this has been going on for years. I have no social life, so I wind up talking to my own thoughts. Overall, I don't have a very good lifestyle, and my mom blames it on the fact my mind is on the 'other side of the galaxy.' She can see and hear things from me all the time, and assumes everybody else does too. Since I started MD as a kid, I never took in mind that daydreaming would ruin my adulthood and it certainly has. I took up computer graphics as a major and hoped for a successful career, but this never happened, so I still live at home. It's embarrassing that I never flew the coop and I'm 33 years old.
I've been caught with MD many times, and I can say that it definitely gets disheartening. Socially, I feel like MD has created a gap between how I really want to express myself and how I actually end up expressing myself towards other people. At times it's really frustrating, and sometimes I just feel like giving up and retreating further into my MD.
However, I think it's extremely important to recognize how far you've come. Don't be too hard on yourself. Even though you weren't able to accomplish certain steps at the time you were expecting them to have been done, it doesn't mean things will always be this way. You're 33 and you still have so much ahead of you. Every day can be a new start.
Silver Swan, I've read a lot of your posts and it seems like you've made tremendous progress towards overcoming MD. This is only the beginning for so many greater things to come. With every small step forward, you get one step closer to a real life you've always wanted to live. Progress can be slow at times, and occusionally things may seem to go backwards for a bit, but that's all part of the process.
I'm confident that you have an amazing future ahead of you, and I can't wait to hear about your journey along the way.