Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
This song was my "soundtrack".
A little background: my main character is named Alex Stone. He is currently 42. He came back from Italy after 3 years of making new friends and embarking on new adventures. Along the way, he stopped drinking (besides the glass of wine with dinner), stopped the party animal lifestyle, and stopped having casual sex.
Upon his return to the States, he and his estranged best friend/brother have to work through some issues. His brother/former best friend, Jordan, and he go through some awkwardness and repairing of their relationship (Alex had an affair with Jordan's wife just prior to his departure for Italy). They become closer than ever, through it all. Jordan though, Alex realizes, has taken up Alex's old party ways. He likes to stay out late, get drunk, and sleep with the hottest girl he can get to come home with him. Alex is put off by this lifestyle though.
Using the linked song, "Miss Jackson", I create (and act out/pace the room) a scene where Alex is out with Jordan and the temptation builds. He's fighting the demons, but he can't do it for long. He's not strong enough. The scene leads to him participating in some explicit activity in his hotel room. He finds himself pounding shots of liquor again. Feeling the dizziness, the headache, the foggy mind and numbness. I will spare the gritty details, as I think we're supposed to keep it kind of clean on here, but Alex gives in to his former self. Rather, he feels like his former self drags him back to hell (Alex is also bi-polar, which I imagine plays into his actions a lot).
The song is a perfect backdrop for it, with its sugary, over-the-top catchiness. The singer's voice is too smooth, too. It just puts me in the perfect mindframe of Alex and how he feels so ashamed for caving into his old lifestyle. It's an old wound that's been reopened. It's a former addiction coming back to grab him.
He's better than ever, mentally and physically. At least he was upon his return from Italy. He knows he's capable of more. Yet he winds up in a drunken stupor, engaging in mindless sexual activity. Like he used to in his 20s. And even somewhat in his 30s. Oh, the flashbacks. Oh, the inner turmoil he fights.
Oh, how addicted I am to this new storyline!
Aw, thank you. And I thought you were from England. Do you guys say "I reckon"? LOL We southerners certainly do. :)
Aww, thank you Sandra. That has me smiling so big this morning!
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