An example of how daydreaming effects my life. #@$%!!!

 

I just handed in my final research paper for one of my classes.

Because I handed it in 3 days late, I got a B. My teacher has emphasized that I'm a good writer, with out-of-the-box perspectives, and a "poetic mind" as she call it (lol). I'm not bragging, just trying to emphasize what my grade could have been if I'd handed it in on time. It's a shame really. :(

 

Why was the paper late? Because my time management is pitiful. Why? Because maladaptive daydreaming makes my mind constantly have to switch in and out of the events of my life, making me a generally flighty person.

 

I don't know about you, but I forget at least two things every time I leave the house (we have to stop thinking this kind of thing is "normal")

I tend to think that I can sneak away, and take an hour or so to get lost with the characters in my dream world. While I do think that we have pent-up needs to daydream that must be fulfilled, whichever way you slice it, it is still time spent not really living.

I could have spent that hour finding published sources for my paper, for example. (this a lot more interesting than it sounds)

 

What are some concrete ways that MD affects your life? We need to prove to ourselves that this is a serious problem. "Barely getting by" is not really living, guys!

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Comment by Delorean Jones on June 10, 2011 at 2:29pm

Well. It's kinda like all the good feelings from positive daydreams and ideas that I might make happen one day make this brain-chemical slushi that keeps me afloat on good days. But when that's gone, I'm left with a whole lotta nothin'. The bottom line is, I need to turn my daydreams into art or i'd just be left with a bunch of memories of stuff that never happened. B's not bad.

 

Yeah, I usually have to  go back into the house 2-3 times to get something every time I try to leave.

Comment by Tila on January 2, 2011 at 8:52pm

Hey everyone,

I've realized that it doesn't quite make sense to look for "concrete" ways.....every experience we share on this site is important, whether it materializes in our "real life" or stays in our head. Change happens from the inside out.

Comment by Elisha on December 30, 2010 at 3:21pm

''How it affects me concretely: Most of my daydreams revolve around real people, in social situations. Like I just stated in my previous paragraph, I daydream about this situations, but then have to realize that none of them are real, that I haven't actually made any new friends, even though the people I am imagining are real. What I NEED to do is cross that line, stop imagining the situation and actually make the situation real.''

but somehow the damn thing never goes right so i run back into my world to emotionally heal. one of the best advantages is the ability to make a real events that hurt seem like  a distant dream in five minutes for... forever. :)

Comment by Heinriech Heisner on December 21, 2010 at 9:29pm
Yep, sounds like my school career. I never seem to be able to complete it. I'm always wandering off to some new idea, which I guess I am adapting myself to. I wish I could just focus on a few things though. It's so much easier to just wander and drift.

I'm learning to live without the intense daydreaming, but tonight I have a cold and it's really hard to concentrate, so I'm reliving my past by daydreaming about my future. I keep going off in tangents dreaming about things that I want to do, but I have to keep reminding myself I am still in my room, and then it's like "Oh, yeah, it's still not real".

How it affects me concretely: Most of my daydreams revolve around real people, in social situations. Like I just stated in my previous paragraph, I daydream about this situations, but then have to realize that none of them are real, that I haven't actually made any new friends, even though the people I am imagining are real. What I NEED to do is cross that line, stop imagining the situation and actually make the situation real.
Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on December 21, 2010 at 5:55pm
Yeah, well it can definitely be drastic. It sucks when you see it start to affect things you care about like that. It really sucks. You should definitely speak out and share as much as you feel comfortable. Not only does it help to scream it out.......it helps when other people read it. Those who don't have it (like docs, people at school, families) can see how it affects us, and people who have it and are just discovering it can see your story and know they're not alone. Almost every new member who comes on here tells me they thought they were the only one and are so glad others are sharing their stories. You can really help a lot by sharing. Small consolation, I know, but still. Thanks for sharing.
Comment by Tila on December 21, 2010 at 5:40pm

 .....walking into traffic definitely counts as real!

I guess the post was badly titled. I'm not saying that describing how we feel isn't "real"- it is so so so important!

But my thoughts and feelings are so constantly fluctuating that they aren't always real to me. What I meant by "real" is how they manifest in my actions, or in the projects I am trying to finish (like projects for school). I see thoughts as fluid, and actions as concrete.

I guess I need to watch how I use words....."real" is so vague, I can see why you were confused :/

 

Basically, I let my daydream world interfere with my thoughts (I try to stop, but it's hard to resist!) and this has negative effects on the projects in my life, which I am passionate about.

Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on December 21, 2010 at 4:28pm
I don't know what you mean by "real" reasons.  What about all the things we've listed?  Why aren't those real to you?  Walking out into traffic and almost getting killed multiple times seems pretty serious to me.  We've said a lot of real things on here.  We've poured out our hearts.  Why doesn't this count?
Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on December 21, 2010 at 4:23pm

I think we've described at length the ways MD has affected us.  If you're doubting yourself............don't.  I know this is a problem.  It's well-documented.  Perhaps I haven't gone into as much detail here as I thought.......but the problems are just so vast and hard to explain that I don't know how to describe them in as great detail.  I know I've described them at length in sobbing emails to Cynthia...........about how I can't think or function, about how I can spend all day trying to do a few math problems not because math is hard for me (which it isn't) but because I can't focus and keep forgetting what I'm doing.  It's kinda like trying to read a book but only seeing one word at a time, so it's really hard to piece it together.  I don't forget a few things a day.  I'm constantly zoned out and forget things CONSTANTLY.  The only things I can do are things that are easy enough to do while in a complete daze.  It's really, really bad.  I actually took an F in calculus because I couldn't focus enough to get caught up.  

 

Anyway, do whatever you need to do to "prove" it to yourself.  Let it all out.  I'm sorry you're disbelieving yourself.  I've known the severity of how it affects me since I was a kid.  It's been causing me great struggles with school for about 20 years or more.  We're here because it's affecting us.  

 

 

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