I haven't visited this site for quite a while but recently I've seen a comment from DebbieP (hi,Debbie!) that made me go back to the post 'My life is perpetual moulding and disintegration' to see how much things have changed.

And they changed a lot.

First of all, yes Debbie, I managed to complete my dissertation and it was the best dissertation of the year. What is more, two months ago I completed another successful dissertation that gave me master's degree.

Currently I…

Almost two weeks ago I had an appointment with Ψ and they decided it is high time we do things instead of just talking. The first task was to write down all the advantages and disadvantages of my clandestine life.  With one simple gesture I unveiled the dark side of the world so dear to me -  I deconstructed my little paradise, piece by piece. To my surprise, finding a counterbalance turned out to be a daunting task.

I realized that my world, that…

This post here was initially just a comment which I wanted to leave under my last post, but then it all just exploded and I decided to make it a separate post.

First of all, I wanted to thank you all for the replies in my previous posts. I want you to know that I really appreciate that you're reading these short texts and that you share your own experience - it's somehow empowering. Surprisingly.

It feels nice to know that I'm not alone with this, that there are other people…

I decided to write this post instead of plunging into my daydreams.

I'm writing this post, because I feel frustrated.

I'm about to fall apart. Not the first time and definitely not the last.

I've wasted a week on daydreaming. Instead of doing research for my dissertation, looking for a job, preparing for jobi nterviews, writing a personal statement for my postgraduate application, studying for my courses to make most of this last semester of my undergrad studies,…

I already stopped counting how many times I pushed the 'Add Blog Post' button.  I must have produced thousand words so far; they disappeared as soon as they appeared, those cripple words which my thoughts did not want to embody, and which, therefore, my fingers mercilessly erased. I have never liked the beginnings, those first steps, first words which have never been truly first. 

Anyway.

Since I can remember I have never been alone.

Since I can remember I have…