Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
When I'm low I cheer myself up with fake scenarios in my head, often without being conscious of doing it.
Maybe I dream of people paying attention to me, listening to me, being affectionate, or going on an adventure with my favourite characters.
Yet I find having MD makes it harder to remember the good times.
I wondered if you guys are willing to share your happy memories with me, and encourage some positive reinforcement of the good things that living in reality can bring.
I'd say staying in the present moment or staying in reality itself makes me happy. All my life I've always envied people who did not have MD and could stay in the reality without making any efforts. And now that even I can stay in reality ( atleast for half of the time) I feel happy. Plus I feel more in control. I know what I'm spending my time on from morning to evening, for how long was I productive and how much time I wasted on the phone. So I'm aware of how I spend my days and what improvements I need to make. MD for me was like being in a haze. Sometimes I used to get so engrossed in it that I did not even know when the mornings turned into nights. I did not feel like I was living my life back then and that made me sad.
Most of my happy memories are the times which I spent with my family and cousins on vacations or trips. And also the fun I had with my friends during offline lectures.
My happy memories would be the times where I've played well in video games, hanging out with my friends while bunking classes and whenever anyone takes time to post birthday stories on their Instagram for me. That gets me really happy. If you have even just 1 person in your life who understands you completely and with whom you can share your happiness as well as your sadness, then trust me, life becomes a whole lot easier. I'm fortunate to have found my current set of friends after years of feeling like a nomad, circling amongst groups of people. We've been through some really happy times as well as really tough times too. And we will continue to be there. through thick and thin. I hope you also have people like that in your life or will get people like that. It can be from anywhere. Whether it be through online games or mutual class or workmates. Even from this network for that matter.
My favourite happy memories are the ones that are not just happy, but that are... also sort of unique, or even odd. I think I have always wanted to live an intense life. So, I am always wondering "If I were to have a book or a film out of my life, would it be worth watching? Would it be interesting, or fascinating?"
Some of my favourite happy moments are:
A visit to a beautiful but not very famous museum in winter, and me and my partner were totally alone among the whiteness of statues (I felt like Keira Knightly in Pride and Prejudice).
A trip alone in Naples; I am fond of a memory of a lunch in a small restaurant, hot sun, tables on the narrow street, eating wonderful seafood, drinking wine and reading Lovecraft's horror stories.
A kid with heavy glasses that made hilarious huge eyes, that I was helping with homework as he was struggling with school, saying to me he wanted to become a "doctor for children".
At 17 years old, eating onion rings at a bus station with a friend on a trip abroad, when I realized "omg, I'm grown up now".
A few days that I have painted a room in my apartment, blue and yellow. I was so satisfied with myself!
So, I think life is worth living more than dreaming when I think of these moments.
Thank you. It is really helpful just bringing our mind to happiness.
Those are some lovely memories : ) you made me smile. I wish I can also travel around more and create beautiful memories after this pandemic is over.
Playing with my kids when they were younger are some of the happiest memories I have. I'm not talking about just every day playing, but also special stuff like going to the pool and just being in the moment with them. The joy on their faces and how my heart echoed their expressions are what I take away most from those memories.
Like you, I sometimes cheer myself up in the same way. Or I'll imagine things that I've done being different than what they were. Like,"Oh, if I had said or done this or that then it would've been so much better." But, in the end that makes me sad because it's not what really happened.
Sometimes looking through pictures helps me with remembering my favorite moments.