Journey to a Life Free of Maladaptive Daydreaming

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 1 - I've been Maladaptive Daydreaming for over four years now, and I know that it's time to stop. I've recently been able to improve my life, but am facing some obstacles right now and want to clear my mind and focus on improvement. Today I spent a huge amount of time in depression and daydreaming, trying to escape my current circumstances and overlooking all the blessings in my life. I truly believe that all our lives have so much value, value beyond our imagination, and that we should try our hardest to recognize that value. So right now, I will take small steps, starting off by forgiving myself for all the mistakes I have made, and calmly take on whatever I need to do.

[David Burkett]

If you guys could give a definition to what you are doing, would you prefer to call it interacting with daydreams or interacting with fantasies?

[Silver Swan]

Interacting with fantasies. Daydreaming is when your dosing off to sleep and dazed out in another world.

Fantasizing is when your sharply awake and alert with what's going on, but you got the feeling some fictional entity is always by your side and talking to you under any circumstance. Kind of like Happy!

I often feel whenever I bicker, shout or curse it's at a fictional person, not a real life person. I can tell, because everybody real switches their heads at me or asks me who I'm talking to.

[Briona]

Yeah interacting with fantasies seems like the better definition. Interacting on such a deep level that you can see and actually feel everything as if it were real, yet at the same time knowing it's not real. I describe it like having a foot in both worlds.

[Dnivog97]

any updates o your battle with mdd?

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 1 - I think it's been a few years since I last posted here. I have a lot of goals and dreams for my life, but I'm noticing that I've been spending more and more time MDing, largely as a response to stress and disappointment. I want to challenge myself to try to post here consistently for 30 days, so I can focus my efforts on curbing the amount of time I spend MDing. One day, I believe that I can live free of MD for good.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 3 - Today was a fairly relaxing day overall. I definitely think that getting plenty of sleep last night helped tremendously with calming my mental state. I did feel a significant degree of control over my mind. Also, I noticed one MD episode today where I had a fairly compelling daydream, one that is usually hard to step back from. However, after a few repeated and concentrated attempts, I was able to step back from the daydream and come back to my current situation. I think journaling and really making a conscious effort towards curbing MD has definitely been helpful these last few days.

[Silver Swan]

I just about got over my battle with mdd, but it did a sum of damage to my life. It used to make me happy in mind, but it eventually gave me a rutty future. I'm glad I stopped when I did. Others have easily discovered me doing mdd, simply due to not being able to communicate and their reactions were memorable. Kind of makes me sick to think.

[Briona]

You're making great progress. I'm happy for you, just take it one day at a time like you are, and don't beat yourself up. 

Ulaan Gom said:

Day 3 - Today was a fairly relaxing day overall. I definitely think that getting plenty of sleep last night helped tremendously with calming my mental state. I did feel a significant degree of control over my mind. Also, I noticed one MD episode today where I had a fairly compelling daydream, one that is usually hard to step back from. However, after a few repeated and concentrated attempts, I was able to step back from the daydream and come back to my current situation. I think journaling and really making a conscious effort towards curbing MD has definitely been helpful these last few days.

[Ulaan Gom]

Thank you for the encouragement. I completely agree with you that that is the right attitude to have, and I will continue to press forward through the successes and failures.

Briona said:

You're making great progress. I'm happy for you, just take it one day at a time like you are, and don't beat yourself up.

[Ulaan Gom]

Silver Swan, I feel you on that point. While I personally have a ways to go before I fully overcome mdd, I think I'm slowly beginning to realize how much it has taken away from my life. I'm sure though that there are many effects of mdd that I am not fully conscious of yet, ones that I may realize further along into my journey. Even though our futures have been significantly altered by mdd, I know it's absolutely not too late for a fresh start, and I'm excited to build a new life.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 4 - Today my MD was definitely a bit more intense than it has been the previous couple of days. During the majority of the morning and afternoon, my MD was largely at bay. However, in the evening, I ended up going on a run, and taking a shower right after. For some reason, I'm honestly not sure why, that combination always seems to produce intense daydreams. It was hard to step back from my train of daydreams, but my mind is beginning to settle down now. For encouragement, I can remind myself of the things I want in life beyond daydreams. I want to be more present with situations, have more meaningful and real social interactions and friends, want to do better with my work, and want to challenge myself to get to new heights.

[Ulaan Gom]

Day 5 - Today definitely has been pretty difficult controlling my daydreams. I know that tiredness is certainly a factor that has been contributing a large deal towards my high levels of MD. However, I also know that it's not the only factor at play. I feel that today, the weight of the future, uncertainties, and lack of direction definitely hit me. I need to recognize that it's okay to feel these feelings, and also give myself the time to recognize and celebrate every small victory along the way. I think taking small steps is key, as these baby steps will ultimately allow me to move forward. For the future, I think it's important to have faith that things will work out, granted I live each present moment to the best I can.