MD and Real Life's responses

[Jessica Ballantyne]

Has maladaptive daydreaming gave you so much hope and assures you things. But real life keeps biting back you in the ass—like fuck? It throws you off guard to an extent you're mad at yourself for being so foolish and unaware of what's really going on around you. You wanted aspects of you life to look like MD, and it just doesn't. You want friends and relationships, when really, it's hard to find great people who like you. Or people get you the wrong way, and throw it in your face...and you're unprepared for it. I find my MD just gets angrier when I deal with people who aren't nice to me. And then they're like, "What are you doing?! What's out there doesn't look like your imaginary friends or your inner ambitions. 

[First]

I feel we have spent so much time inside in MD since childhood that we never really gave time to develop social skills. For example, a child learns everything by observing. But since we were very busy in mind we never observed how the world works.  Now that we are adults we are forced to interact with real people and real world but with zero interaction skills. I would suggest you to invest more time in developing social skills. Best way would be to join volunteering group which helps other people. This not only helps with your skills but also gives you sense of satisfaction and confidence. 

[The1andonlyAbber]

Seconding this

[Jessica Ballantyne]

I always wondered why friends and relationships are extremely hard to come by. My sister did grow up developing social skills and observed how the world works. She goes on dates all the time. I don't, because I didn't grow up like her. I got made fun of all my life, all because of this issue. It wasn't fair for me, but it's just the way things were. I was an extremely quiet person who lived in her head all the time. Now that you told me this, I will do things vice versa. 

[SA]

I believe you're right. MD has given me things the way I want them to be. It has assured me in times of self-doubt. It has led to decisions made in a hurry or in an emotional state as I had daydreamed that things would pan out well. Sometimes, it does but most of the times, I have no real proof. As far as people and relations are concerned, yes. I have been overly optimistic and given individuals the benefit of the doubt. Whereas, the real world operates on superficial interactions most of the times. Yes! You do have good people out there but the general consensus is superficial generosity. There have been times when I have had unrealistic views of other people's natures or their behavior has led me into believing I can open up or be close to that person. In reality, it ended in that person ghosting me or treating me like a pushover. This has especially been common in school, college and at work too. I have been perceived as too naive or very foolish or a kid-like person. It's just that when you daydream so much and avoid the real life, you just don't develop the necessary social skills to get through life. 

[Jessica Ballantyne]

I knew very, very, very few people are warm, loving and accept me as a person. Possibly 2 or 3. I have a close friend of 21 years who I never hang out with. She makes excuses to not see me, and once mentioned she really doesn't want to. Sometimes I wonder if she just doesn't desire to be around me anymore, but is being subtle about it in her emails. I honestly don't consider that a good friend. Again, I've had very few people who were ever close and admired me as a person. Most come and go, and I probably never see them again. I've never even met my life mate, and I'm coming closer to 40. Bottom line is I didn't ever connect with people in that way. Most of the time, I'm with myself and do things practically by myself. You'd never see me hang out in groups. It's enough to convince me that might as well be the rest of my future. 

I do have an exceptionally intelligent and gifted mind where I daydream like I breath air. It makes people think I'm a strange girl who doesn't talk, and doesn't listen up, and is gone somewhere in a place they don't know about. It will make them wonder if I'm OK, or if I even like them. And to be quite honest, I've never been on a date in my whole life. And every time I go into social situations, whoever is there suddenly strikes up a conversation about how QUIET I am, to the whole room. I have had people berate that I have no social life and no friends. They just don't see or understand why I am, the way I am. Or why my eyes get all dazed and what I'm giggling at. They simply don't think I'm a normal person. They give me a hard time, look at me like I'm a UFO, and scoot off in an aloof manner. Even my own sister gets disturbed around me. 

f I knew I was going to be with someone special....I would've seen it and known it a while ago.