feel like you have an open wound

[Yelena Cheeli]

ok, but have you ever read a book, or a movie, or seen a news article about some famous person, of something that happened and it hurt you like it was you? and it hurt like hell and you were devastated for weeks and not even daydreaming could make it better? i have these moments and i am going through one right now. i avoid reading/watching/knowing other things for two reasons: not to daydream about them and not to feel their pain. and i wonder if this is dissociation in its deepest form? because i feel exactly like an open wound that everything and anything can get into. maybe i am so desperate to feel any real feeling that is mine that i am absorbing any feeling from anything i see? it's so shitty. it's so exhausting and i can't stand feeling like this anymore for things i haven't even experienced. i mean, i hope for an ideal world where people have empathy for each other, but it doesn't feel like empathy to me and it feels more like a cruel absorption. what do you think about that?

[Valeria Franco]

Yes, it did happen to me, many times.

And I have learnt something about it. There's always a reason why it hurts, and the reason may not be straightforward.

Situations, books, people, stories... they act as mirrors of ourselves.

We are hurt by certain things and not by others. The pain is like an echo inside us, we hear it and we don't know exactly where it comes from.

It's not empathy, empathy means that you understand what the other person feels, but you remain untouched because you know it's not your pain (or other emotion) but it's the other person's.

What situations make you feel more hurt?

[Yelena Cheeli]

I feel extremely exhausted by stories of cheat/betrayal .... It makes me sick to such a degree that I avoid any story that has this kind of plot, this last time was with a story in a social network because any series or book that has this I just cut it out of my life. Which is funny because I've never dated or been through anything like that but just the possibility of it happening to me someday gives me the creeps. I don't think I will ever be able to trust a boyfriend completely, which makes me think I will never have a healthy relationship.