Scared to leave???

[Micheala Frances]

Hi everybody! I'm 13 and had MD for 8 yrs, started when I was 4-5-- anyway I wanted to ask if anyone had this problem that I do.
I have a character so in detail (and in a way she's/he's my dream person) that I'm scared to leave him/her behind.
I've been trying to not dd during the day and I get through the day pretty well but still at times I feel my character misses me? It may sound really stupid but I feel through the day
I should say "hi" or "I love you" so my character won't think I abandoned her/him?
And when I do come to reality I miss my character and want so badly for the person to be real that I cry--excuse me SOB! That I'm hurting his/her feelings but again I kno I need to let go because I've got to live! I need help! I don't kno which way to take! And it's so hard to say "my character is just imaginary" you might just find me sobbing.
BTW how much in detail are your characters? If a police man asked me to discribe him/her you guys could see what she/he really looks like. That's how much I detail in each and every character.

[Rachel]

Most of my characters are very detailed, but that's because their from movies or TV shows. Some, however, are solely from my imagination, and those are very detailed too. The same as the ones from movies/TV shows.

As for you wanted your character to feel like you haven't abandoned her/him, well, I'm not usually great at giving advice but I don't see a problem with saying hi once in a while during the day, if you are careful with when you say hi (if it'll take you into a daydream). Maybe at lunch or freetime in class or passing time or on the bus. If it won't take you into a daydream or take away your attention from class to say hi, just do it whenever you want.

[Amoka]

I remember someone once told me that the human brain can't make up faces, that even when you dream the strangers in the dream are actually people you might've seen in the shopping centre or on the street, but it is impossible for the brain to completely invent a face. I laughed at her and we argued for the whole half an hour lunch break. I have crystal clear images of all my characters, I draw them all the time (or at least try to - a lot of the time they turn out completely different :P ), and my characters are often in my dreams. And I certainly would have remembered seeing faces on the street as perfect as my characters' faces.

And yes, I feel like I'm betraying them when I try to quit dd. They helped me through heaps of bad stuff and I feel bad for trying to get rid of them. I tell myself they are deceptive and poison for my brain. Apparently that hasn't worked for me so far.... still trying to quit. And I'm scared of how to live without daydreaming. 

[Rashomon Effect]

I read an article that said  people we see in our dreams are based on people we have seen in our waking hours. It didn't say  that the human brain can't invent a face. The article said that folks who are born blind do not see in their dreams either.

As far as having such an emotional attachment to a daydream character that you feel you are betraying them by not thinking about them, I can't relate to that at all. There are a lot of folks on this form who can relate to that, but I don't see it as being any different than having a strong emotional attachment to a toy. The toy doesn't have any feelings. The feelings are all yours.

Randomo said:

I remember someone once told me that the human brain can't make up faces, that even when you dream the strangers in the dream are actually people you might've seen in the shopping centre or on the street, but it is impossible for the brain to completely invent a face. I laughed at her and we argued for the whole half an hour lunch break. I have crystal clear images of all my characters, I draw them all the time (or at least try to - a lot of the time they turn out completely different :P ), and my characters are often in my dreams. And I certainly would have remembered seeing faces on the street as perfect as my characters' faces.

And yes, I feel like I'm betraying them when I try to quit dd. They helped me through heaps of bad stuff and I feel bad for trying to get rid of them. I tell myself they are deceptive and poison for my brain. Apparently that hasn't worked for me so far.... still trying to quit. And I'm scared of how to live without daydreaming. 

[Sarah Beth]

Hm. I've actually been there. And it wasn't pretty, either. It sucked. My main character was like a brother to me, but finally I got to the point where I realized that it wasn't healthy to be interacting with someone who didn't exist. So, I told him that he didn't exist, and that I wasn't going to talk to him anymore because of that.

I will never forget how angry and hurt he was. He is very strong-willed and independent, and for me to outright tell him that he was no more than a figment of my imagination was shell-shocking. He stormed off and was angry for a long time. But I kept my foot down and wouldn't let him come back. I still daydreamed about other stuff, but I never allowed myself to slip back into talking to him. I kinda felt like he was staying away on purpose, anyway.

Then he came back. I remember exactly where I was when it happened. He was calm and submissive (which is NOT like him at all). He basically said, "Look. I know that I don't exist. And I know you don't want to talk to me anymore because I'm not real. I'm fine with that now. It sucks, but I can't change it. But... I don't have anywhere else to go. You don't have to talk to me, or do anything with me, but if it's okay, I'd like to be here, just in case you feel like crap and need to talk to someone to help you sort it out."

So I let him come back. In the years since, I have created a new home for him: my DD universe, where all of my once imaginary friends now reside as characters in a book. He is the only one who remembers that he used to be my imaginary friend, and understands that I'm trying to live my life in the real world. Now I'll hear him yelling at me to stay on task and focus on what I'm supposed to me doing in the real world. xD

Moral of the story: It's going to suck, but you've got to tell this character of yours about the dilemma your in. He/she is not going to like it. He/she may throw a tantrum, cry, yell, storm off, etc. But you've gotta be strong about this. Hopefully, with time, you might be able to create a space for him/her where he/she won't be so taxing on your real world life. Until then, you've got to kick him/her clear to the next galaxy.

I hope this helps. :)