Hi everyone, I’m French, 23 and I just recently found out that there is a medical term for my « inside stories » that is maladaptive daydreaming . I’m happy that there is such a place to talk with you all.
I read a lot about your own experiences, I saw that some of you wants to stop because it can affect love or social life.
I started daydream in middle school, around 12 or 13 yo. At that time I was often bullied and my days were long and lonely. I loved (and still do) to project myself as main character of some book or movie or serie and either remake the story or mix it with other stories that I like. I got really into it and when I’m alone I make myself cry, or angry, or fired up, or sad. And I also listen to music.
At some point, I don’t remember when, I found out that play with some tennis ball help me focus on my stories and started to do it a lot. My family found it strange but got used to it. I never told anyone that I had such vivid dreams and plot in my head, so I guess they just stop thinking about how weird I am. Music and walking and any activity that doesn’t need to think about it and I also MD. I try not to do anything weird when MD but I know that I do a blank and bored face.
I always had hard time to focus at school or with others but this habit made it even more difficult, I can cut myself completely from a conversation if I’m too bored and go with some much entertaining story in my head.
It always had been something I like but recently (not last year though) I realized that I rather spend my evening alone than go out with my friends or spend time with my family. I always come to regret it when I realize everyone had a good time and I chose not to. And also it is a way to spend time and procrastinate while I should now start to find a job and a place to live and make my own life. Though I love it and don’t want to stop, I feel like I should find a way not to be so addicted to it. I spent four months with a flatmate 2 years ago and it was really difficult not to be able to do my thing everytime she was here.
Does anyone know how to find a balance and not use MD to escape from my life anytime I have a stressful change coming?
Thank you all