Yo, so. Here i am.

I have to go back to trying stop MD, cause i know i have a problem, and in moments like the one i am - filled with school things - i darydream more than normal, even tho, i think is like a way my brain remembers me i have this addiction. School really helps me stop with the daydreaming, is almost impossible for me to daydream when i am studing, talking to people. 

These days i was like, 2 in the morning, daydreaming, then i just got like: "Bro i am such a…

It's been a while. I tried to stop, but then the next week i felt even more wanting to do daydream. And i know pretty well this is a bad sign, but i decided to wait psicological help so i wont hurt myself doing so.

I wanted to talk about Anne, one of my creations. She is like me, her body size and type, her mood, problems. Obviously she had a drama on it, but in geral, she looks a bit like me. She, at least to me, is my ideal version of myself. Anne is a 16y girl, lesbian, who never…

So, i started here two weeks ago, you dont really have to read this, i just want to keep my progress writed down and maybe give a bit of a hope to other persons going trought the same problems.

First of all, i'm trying to keep track of time of how much i fantasize, maybe i'll put a chronometer to get it right, but every day after i wake up, at lunch and after dinner i fantasize for like 30 minutes or 15.

Sometimes i turn off the clock and continue doing it anyway, but…

I think, at least to me, that my life wont be more  "boring" without daydreaming, It'll be only harsh, my imagination always had been with me, and now im trying to resist MD, its hard to think how my life will be without it. 

I ask myself if i one day ill stop talking out loud to myself, cause these days i'm even feeling bad doing so, it gives me a disassociation feeling. 

I'm a writer, so is ever harder not to do it with my own stories. 

I feel like i will have to kbow…

(English isn't my mother language so if i spell something wrong, sorry)

Ever since i knew myself i was a lonely kid, bullied in school ever since first grade, in my kindergarten i was the crybaby, and even my family disapproved of it and always had pointed out how i was emotional and easily depressed. My brother said that ever since I was 5 I was too anxious for a kid. …