This week has been hectic, i mean 12 hours of work a day, Im actually pretty sad today cause as a huge Lakers fan my biggest idol Kobe Bryant took a season ending injury. He has stood as the epitomie of ambition, strength and I idolize him , just through watching him too never let your past ruin your present. So for the next week Im going to go even harder at the books to ace those finals and go hard at the gym. This year is going to be my time, at this point I feel incredible confident as I…

Hey guys, long time! been pretty busy preparing for finals and going to the gym. Im hyped, I am transitioning into my new schedule pretty well. Definitely easier to control MD, or prevent myself from "surface using". I only hope to keep on this roll, plus on another note, I have begun to make more friends at school!, I decided to man up and step out of my comfort zone for once and talk to just complete strangers in class, and honestly I have made friends with some interesting characters. …

Hi guys, just finished my research paper!, was brutal but Im glad Im done. I was home all day today tempted 4x for like 3 hours to "surface use" MD, I got out of the house and walked to starbucks and read a book there until I felt I had control and came home. FOR ALL DDERS quiting until they can control it, THERE IS A PRICE TO PLAY, and that price is sometimes having to constantly stop what your doing and engaging in something that will get your mind off DD( going out for a job, playing…

Hey guys! So today was pretty easy at least in terms of dealing with MD, mainly cause I was in the public eye for 95% of the day, so I didn't have a strong temptation to "surface use" but of course when Im at home, its a completely different level of temptation. But today went well, I just kept working on my History paper which is late, but right now Im motivated to just finish to the best of my capabilities. But other then that, i got nothing new today, just hope you guys had an amazing day…

Hey guys,  just here with my daily update, I put in that sweat equity for 15 hrs!!!,  not easy though, isolation with no distractions while being deprived of DDing at times, not fun, but I promise to all of you MDers, who are trying to stop temporarily until they can control it, It may really suck throughout the day just having too go through the pain of being conscious and focused the whole day, but when all is said and at the end of the day, when you look back on the day it feels good to…

Well, I didn't have time to even DD or at least "surface use" with music, cause I was working next to my study buddy all day at Uni for 14 hours! woot, but all I can say is even though I did have a strong urge at school to ask for my friends headphone and go into my world, I just went for a walk and grabbed some coffee, and came back and just got back into it, getting some fresh air can do the trick sometimes guys!, but only day 3, long way to go, but right now I feel good mainly cause of…

As I figured, the first couple of days are well lets say are extrodinarily difficult to overcome, as in the 2nd day I almost gave into my trigger of music, but was able to keep composed( even took it drained hours of my time just resisting it), but Im glad to say I have made it too Day 2. I honestly felt like crap cause i felt like i need a fix of some DDing, but it will get easier to bear in time i hope. But other than that Im out for the day and hope to make it to day 3.

Hi guys I am starting a thread of blogs, to show you my progress as I overcome MDD, I have done extensive research to have the blueprint of success in overcoming this unproductive act( I know some people may be okay with DDing) but this is holding me back from reaching my full potential. To go along with MDD, I have had a really low self-esteem and acted out as the "nice guy" and let people take my kindness for granted and walk all over me( this includes my ex gf, my ex  friends,…

A couple months back I went through a breakup, and well It was very difficult, and i ended up turning to md to cope with it by goinginto my own imaginary world. It has become harder to cope with after the breakup, and also going forth, I have really bad triggers, like I use "very loud music" too get into my trance and I have the repetitive movement of jumping, which believe it or not has affected my knees, as the impact from jumping has given me knee pain, and im afraid if this persists, im…