Is it normal to like it and hate it at the same time?

[Sarah Sarah]

Ok, I'm new here so I'm not really sure how this works. So I'm pretty sure I have MDD but my parents have always said I just have a great imagination.
Normally I pace around my room for hours on end off in my own world. While I do it, I listen to music. It doesn't matter what kind. I spend hours doing this. On the times my mam has walked in she tells me I'm making "faces" and gestures. Sometimes I'll even be crying depending on what happens in the daydream.
I honestly think it would be musch better if I stopped this. I daydream in school all the time, and I can't even sit down to do my homework. Every few minutes I'll have to stand up and pace and daydream about a book or movie or whatever it is I have recently seen. I twist the stories and make then my own. I also have some ongoing daydreams, that I've had for months or years.
I hate being like this and I want it to stop. At the same time, it feels like an addiction. While I'm out with friends, all I do is think about leaving so that I can daydream. I heard it was healthy to daydream and it was good for us. It's been getting in the way lately and even though, in a way I don't want it to because it helps me to get away from thinking of painful things, I think it needs to stop.
Does anyone else feel this way? I feel so alone. There's no one who I can tell. They just say I'm lost in the clouds.

[debbie downer]

welcome. (:

you're definitely not alone. i do the same thing as you. pacing for hours while listening to music and mouthing the words that my characters are saying, and every few minutes having to get up from what i'm doing to pace and then sit back down after a minute, only to do it again a few minutes later.

i don't daydream about books or movies, though. i have an ongoing daydream that i've been daydreaming about for around 4 years now. i used to have several ongoing daydreams, but they all combined into the one as of about 3 years ago.

when i first found out about MD, i was terrified, but only because of the label "disorder". i didn't want to be a freak. but now i love my daydreaming because it helps me through things and i know i wouldn't be the same without it. it does get in the way, but i've found that it helps me more than it harms me. hopefully that'll end up being the case for you. 

please don't feel alone, because you're not. feel free to message me about anything if you want to talk.

[Amanda Lewone]

Hey. Yep, I think it is normal to have a love-hate relationship with it. Like many addictions, it fun in the moment but sometimes the consequenses aren't so fun. 

[The1andonlyAbber]

One moment I'll be with my friends, laughing, admiring the scenery, and thinking about all the crazy stuff we've done together. Then I'll suddenly remember that my friends aren't real, the place I'm at doesn't even exist, and I've never done those things. The daydreams are awesome until you remember they're fake.

[The1andonlyAbber]

Daydreams can be helpful, though. My imaginary friends actually give good advice. They've kept me from doing a lot of stupid things.