Feeling ashamed but can't stop

[SJ]

This is awful to admit and I feel so ashamed for doing it. In my daydreams I have someone at the moment who is my main romantic interest.
I've been having a really tough time losing my friends. I have no idea why but they are no longer speaking to me.
So I have been MDing alot more especially on my days off when I'm alone. I've been pacing alot and listening to music.
The problem is this person is a celebrity not a major one but still on TV. I've recently found their twitter and have been obsessively following it and looking at pictures. I feel really stupid and ashamed.
I'd like to point out I am fully aware I do not know this person or would ever dream of contacting them ever.
But I feel like a creep looking for this person online and reading their twitter.
Does anyone else do this or at least know how to stop?

[Jen]

I don't think you are a creep, I think it's fairly normal to worship celebrities from afar, and our society kind of encourages it by pushing beautiful airbrushed people at us. It would be different if you were personally harassing the person concerned, but it doesn't sound like you are.
I too have had a fantasy romance with someone, always the same person and like you at difficult times in my life, if I'm feeling low or socially isolated. After all a fantasy romance isn't going to dump you or let you down. I've got out of it in the past by my own social life picking up, or by having real partners. I would suggest with you to make little steps, like avoiding Twitter for instance, but don't be hard on yourself. I think of it as a coping mechanism.

[Ulaan Gom]

I agree with Jen's advice. I absolutely believe that this is temporary, and that you will not have to continue living in this MD world over time. Difficult times in real life are rough, and they only make MD more tempting. I wouldn't be hard on yourself for what you're doing, it's totally understandable. However, this moment can be taken as an opportunity for a new beginning. Although you may not see the immediate benefits of doing so, try to develop one new positive habit and stick with it every day regardless if you feel like doing it or not. For me the first of these positive habits has been exercise. I didn't realize how much it would benefit me in the long run when I first started, but over time consistent exercise gave me more confidence and willpower to improve other areas of my life. So for whatever new habit you may choose, the key is being consistent, even if you only practice it for less than five minutes on some days. Over time, you're real life will become more fulfilling and MD will seem less desirable in the end.

[Aj]

I've been in this same situation multiple times before, and I also felt extremely ashamed about it. There are already some great points in this thread, but I wanted to reiterate them and emphasize how they've helped me:
*Realize it's temporary. You won't be thinking about this person forever. Someday, and probably much sooner than you think, you won't care about them at all, or you will just admire them in a "typical fan" way.
*Even though it can be scary, and it won't be nearly as fulfilling as your daydreams at first, try to socialize in the real world. You've probably heard that this is one of the best ways to ease daydreaming, and it's true, though of course it requires work and discomfort when you're initially finding new people to socialize with, or reaching out to people you haven't socialized with in a while.
*Most importantly, try not to feel ashamed about it while it lasts. I know this is so hard because, like you said, it feels so creepy. But accepting the fact that I was excessively daydreaming about a celebrity was the most significant factor that finally allowed me to get over celebrity daydreams. My last celebrity daydream ended a year and a half ago, and I haven't picked up a new one since. That's a huge deal for me because, in the past, when one ended another one would soon begin. And the main thing that helped was having someone tell me that it was OK to daydream, and that I wasn't a bad, creepy, stalkerish person for doing it. Instead, like others in this thread have said, the fact you're daydreaming so much about connecting with someone is totally understandable since you're experiencing such loneliness right now (which again highlights how important socialization is). It also makes sense that it's a celebrity because celebrities are accessible figures who you can see videos and images of whenever you want, and usually those images and videos present a very flawless persona. So of course when your mind feels unbearably lonely, it's going to use those seemingly perfect, accessible figures to create a fantasy connection that will ease your lonely feelings. You need to accept that this is just a coping mechanism to deal with overwhelming pain and loneliness; it's absolutely not something that makes you a bad person (just the fact you're feeling so ashamed about it proves you're not a "dangerous celebrity stalker"). Once you accept that, you should also learn to accept the feelings of shame that accompany it. For example, when you start to feel the shame, tell yourself something like, "I'm having the thought that daydreaming about this person is something to feel ashamed about." Recognize that it's just a thought, just a feeling, but it doesn't mean anything and it has no power unless you give it power by believing it and dwelling on it. For me, when I accepted the fact that I'm someone who daydreams about celebrities when I feel lonely, and when I accepted the feelings of shame that accompany those daydreams, I found that the shame quickly subsided and, soon thereafter, so did the daydreams themselves. Like I said, I now haven't had a celebrity daydream in over a year. Occasionally, and again when I'm feeling especially lonely and depressed, I'll get slight itches to start daydreaming about different celebrities. But because I now recognize it as a coping mechanism that is nothing to be ashamed of, and because I know that socializing can get rid of it (often even something really simple like texting a family member or old friend/acquiantance), the daydreams never actually start. I also found mindfulness, meditation, and the principles of ACT therapy to be extremely helpful in learning to accept my thoughts and feelings. I'm sorry this was so long, but I've been in that situation so many times before and I know how utterly miserable it can be. I hope you find relief soon.