Where wild minds come to rest
I agree with Jen's advice. I absolutely believe that this is temporary, and that you will not have to continue living in this MD world over time. Difficult times in real life are rough, and they only make MD more tempting. I wouldn't be hard on yourself for what you're doing, it's totally understandable. However, this moment can be taken as an opportunity for a new beginning. Although you may not see the immediate benefits of doing so, try to develop one new positive habit and stick with it every day regardless if you feel like doing it or not. For me the first of these positive habits has been exercise. I didn't realize how much it would benefit me in the long run when I first started, but over time consistent exercise gave me more confidence and willpower to improve other areas of my life. So for whatever new habit you may choose, the key is being consistent, even if you only practice it for less than five minutes on some days. Over time, you're real life will become more fulfilling and MD will seem less desirable in the end.