what methods have you tried to apply to get yourself to stop dreaming

[drifter]

I've read in this forum of people trying to stay away from things that trigger them to go into a fantasy world like music, some stopped eating certain food

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

Again, I can't say for sure whether any of you have Schizoid Personality Disorder, Inattentive ADD, Autism Spectrum Disorders, or any of the others that show a lack of social involvement & tendency to daydream..........but I can tell you that I for sure don't. There are countless disorders that can have disconnection and daydreaming as a possible symptom. I wouldn't have spent the past 3 years investigating this if I thought this was any of them. If I'd have found something that fit I would've quit looking & said "Hellelujah!" I've looked into them all, and once I really learned about them I found out they don't fit. They just have some overlapping symptoms. Plus all my doctors ruled them out one by one. There's something deeper going on here. I wouldn't have dedicated all this time on it if there weren't.

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

That's a very good question. I'll see if I can get Cynthia to respond when she has time. It'll probably take a lot more research & thought before we can figure out how to classify it. I'm guessing it's not a personality disorder because I've heard (and I could be completely wrong) that they don't usually start out when you're that young. Some of us, at least, have had this most of our lives. We're definitely avoiding labeling it as Schizo because, aside from the connotation, it really doesn't fit. It's not an anxiety disorder, though it can lead to anxiety and anxiety can definitely make it worse. I'm guessing it'll either be something different or a personality disorder. Not sure if that really helps. I should probably take a psychology class or 2 or look over the DSM again. Cynthia?

Adriene said:

If and when MD becomes an official disorder, what kind of disorder would it be listed under? Personality disorder? Anxiety? Schizo? Or would it be something completely on its own?

Adriene

[Cynthia Schupak]

Wish I knew...my guess is there will be some controversy; my hope is that it doesn't piss us off too much.

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

Uh oh! That sounds ominous! Thanks for replying. :)

Cynthia Schupak said:

Wish I knew...my guess is there will be some controversy; my hope is that it doesn't piss us off too much.

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

Only briefly, once people started listening to me. Since then it's gone up & down like normal.

Adriene said:

Did anyone's daydreaming subside after they started talking about it?

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

I haven't spoken about it to anyone I know really well because I simply don't know anyone really well. I don't have family & all my friends are just glorified acquaintances or people who live far away. The reason it improved for awhile is because I got inspired. Anytime I get inspired & distracted for awhile it subsides for awhile. Then I get used to whatever new thing inspired me, and it gets worse again. It's so random & I have no control over it.
I'm so determined to work on this that I've forced myself not to be as ashamed. I have to make myself talk about it to anyone who'll listen because I need to get the word out, so we can get help. Everyone I've spoken to has been EXTREMELY supportive. All my sorta-friends are cheering me on. It's not a horrible affliction so much as a project, and they're proud of me for working on it. People don't understand at first, but if you approach it from a stance of "I'm working on improving myself, and I want to help other people." then it's really hard to judge that.
I reiterate, that if anyone wants to tell people around them but don't know how, feel free to send them here. They can read up on it & know you're not alone & not making this up. Having a bunch of people around you with similar symptoms will give you instant credibility. Plus, they can ask me questions as well. I'm happy to chat with them whenever I can get the energy. Plus we've got a doctor on board. Cynthia can throw her PHD in the face of anyone who says we're not telling the truth.

Adriene said:

Why do you think that is? Is it because you knew that people knew? Or because you felt guilty?

Cordellia Amethyste Rose said:

Only briefly, once people started listening to me. Since then it's gone up & down like normal.

Adriene said:

Did anyone's daydreaming subside after they started talking about it?

[Shawn Harris]

Nothing like a dose of reality to snap you out of the imaginary realm. I focus on unfortunately the latest News story

filled with the reality of human suffering , I use to Daydream that I could save the world through messages of music.

But now I have exposed myself to enough reality that my mind will not allow me to entertain myself with the thought.

Since I fantasized about being a musical super star I purposely acknowledge the personal tragedies that almost

every individual that has reached the place that I dreamed to attain has endured

I recognize the real lives of the people that I portray and I begin to accept my lot in life

[Magenta]

To stop in the short term, I'll use daydreaming as a reward. If I have a goal I need to reach (ex. writing a paper), I'll say to myself that if I get 5 pages of the paper written, then I can daydream. Most of the time I will be able to concentrate and avoid daydreaming until Icomplete the 5 pages. Staying busy is another thing that temporarily helps to slow the daydreaming. If I get a lull in activity however, even for a few minutes, I will launch right back into my fantasy world. I'm a full time grad student with an internship, so I manage to keep myself busy the majority of the time. Unfortunately, now that it's summer break, I'm daydreaming far more often since I have so much time on my hands. I'm taking a summer session class, so hopefully that will help.

As for a specific method to stop altogether, I'm personally not aware of one. If there was a method out there, I imagine it would be something similar to the addiction recovery model: avoiding people/places/things/situations that might trigger you. Having some sort of couseling and support network in place can be quite helpful as well.

In regards to diagnosis, I believe Cordellia made a really good point earlier about comorbidity. Daydreaming could be a symptom for a multitude of disorders, and attempting to make an accurate diagnosis solely based on that is next to impossible. Every individual is unique and could exhibit symptoms differently. A lot more information would need to be gathered in order to make a diagnosis. I'll be interested to see what category MD would fall under if it becomes a diagnosis in the DSM.

[Cynthia Schupak]

Magenta's self-reward system is interesting -- sort of like all those experiments they do on three-year-olds to see if they are able to delay gratification (don't mean to compare you to a three-year-old, just a free association). Is there anyone else who finds a system like this useful?

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

It doesn't work for me because I can't control it enough to stop it & start it at a certain point. Rare moments when I'm able to focus I'll just keep doing it until I start to shake & feel sick from exhaustion. Most of the time I'm constantly in & out. It's so natural, and I do it simultaneously with whatever else I'm doing that I don't even notice it until hours have passed & I've hardly accomplished anything. I definitely can't decide "Now I'm not going to daydream for 5 or 10 mins." I don't have that much control.

[Nomad]

Thanks for the insight, Sarah and Jacinta. Since reading your posts a few days ago, I've stopped listening to music, and I feel less obsessed. I'm in a twelve-step program, and I've been listening to recordings of people talking about their addictions and recovery instead.

I love this forum. I've been addicted to my fantasy worlds for almost 40 years (I think I started in Kindergarten), and it's been a lonely road. Finding you guys is very exciting.

Jacinta said:

Sarah I can totally feel you on this one. Music is actually almost necessary for me to daydream. My ipod headphones broke and I have spent months on public transportation with no music. I actually want to continue not using my ipod b/c it helps me not daydream.

[Jade]

I try to stay away from music because it is a major trigger for me. I actually find it difficult to daydream without music, so I try to stay away from my iPod as much as I can. This doesn't always work out though considering my incredibly weak will-power and the fact that I'm addicted to daydreaming. It's a very intense and effective form of escapism for me. It's an emotional crutch and that's what makes it so hard to stop.