Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
I thought I would one day reach the age where I no longer have to daydream. I thought that one day I would be able to express my true self with courage and optimism of the future and what it would hold. However, time passed and my draydreams hadnt stopped but only evolved. I wish I had time to go back and not live in my daydream but I cant. I am 26 and I fear that I have wasted so much time not doing a lot of things I was supposed to be doing. I feel like I dont have any goals. I feel like I dont know why I am here. I feel like I have wasted time and I am still wasting time because I dont know what I want. Well, I dont know my career path. Nothing seems to make sense. I thought I was passionate about human rights but that young me cares still but no longer feels that a human rights career will fulfill me. I knew I love writing well at least I like but thats it. I have felt like quitting on my journey but its so hard to quit when I feel like I have so mycg to prove.
I am writing to encourage anyone reading this. I know its hard to stop daydreaming and I know its hard to believe in yourself but you have to keep going. The journey is really worth it. Daydreaming is often a way of hiding some deep feelings of insecurity and sadness. My question for you is how do you feel when you are not daydreaming. How does it feel when your wild thoughts are silents. I am guessing like me it doesnt feel that great, which is why you continue to daydream. But my dear, facing your fears is the only way out. Your fear of rejection, your fear of loneliness. You are the only key to your future. Dont hold back your thoughts and your ambitions. Find what you want and pursue it.
I believe in you!!!!!
Tammy
Comment
I stopped MD a few months ago, I just told myself that I needed to just get to focusing on life and if I'm honest. Although I'm glad that I have got rid of MD. Without it, it has made me realise just how shit and horrible my life is. I'm actually very suicidal because of it. All of the things which used to make me feel happy while I had MD like playing instruments and reading, being on social media. Have vanished because I have realised that they were just small things which lead me to convince myself that life was precious, important and worth living.
My thoughts started to go quiet as I approached my 30's. When I stopped daydreaming, at first, I was in a funk.
My future isn't what I imagined it would be. Rather, it was very unsatisfying and even hapless. I was very poor and lived at home. I had absolutely no friends, and still don't to this day. I began to grow terrified, because I felt so lonely, alienated and cut out. I had high expectations in my future, but for some strange reason, they didn't materialize. My mom even told me that I had no life, because I lived on another planet. I wanted relationships so badly, but they just weren't coming ever, so I felt even more afraid. I figured this was really going to be my future. I didn't continue to daydream because I was so fed up, tired and peevish of my rock bottom life. My daydreams were so deceitful that I wished not to return to them. However, I am now staring at a very unsuccessful and isolated lifestyle, and it feels hard to believe that I can change this. I still hold onto my goals and ambitions no matter what happens next.
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