Wild, Wild Thoughts....

[Tammy O.]

Hello everyone. I hope everyone is doing well.

I never thought I will get to the point that I am really fed up with holding on to things. I love daydreaming because its comforting but at this point I am sick of it. I have held onto people and things that no longer serve me. I have dwelt so much in the past that I cant focus on my future. I have no idea if the career path I am following is actually the path I want to be in. I have no idea why I have so much hate against people that are doing what they really love and are happy. Like why cant I just live instead of in my daydreams? Why cant I live a normal life? In my mind, I always wanted to leave a legacy. It was my dream to inspire people not to quit on their journey but I cant do that if I live in my head. I want to be free. I am not sure of who I am since I have lived only in my head. I am writing because I want to assure everyone that is struggling that they are not alone. Since I experience depression, anxiety and MDD firsthand, I understand that there is a lot of confusion and sometimes one may feel lonely. You are not alone!!! Everything you are going through has a purpose and a season even if it seems forever, it can change. 

This was just rambling but hopefully someone can find it useful.

[F J]

Thank you for this Tammy! My experiences are EXACTLY the same, not one thing written there doesn't apply to me.

It will get better for all of us xxx

[Chris H]

Hi Tammy, 

you are not alone either... My MDD is really challenging at the moment. It's all I do. I talk to myself on the way to work in the car.. As if my character is being interviewed on a famous tv chat show.... I try not to MDD at work, but as soon as I'm alone I can't help it. It is affecting every area of my life. I get excited at the end of the day because I have 4 or 5 hours when I'm alone in the house... It is a nightmare (pardon the pun)... MDD damages reality.