Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
So there's this guy in my class who I have a crush on, I shouldn't because I have a boyfriend, but our relationship's going nowhere so...
Anyway, getting back to the point, I thought that maybe I should use my MD to my advantage and daydream about him being my boyfriend so I don't upset him (he got dumped by his girlfriend today). But when I tried to, I found that I couldn't daydream properly. It wasn't as enjoyable as it normally is, and it didn't seem as real as my other daydreams. I can still DD like normal, only I can't daydream about real life people. i've never tried to before, probably because I didn't know anyone in real life properly, let alone have a crush on them. Is there anyone else out there who can't daydream about real people?
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I have a hard time even lecturing the faces of real people I know or try and focus on sometimes, it's really frustrating.
Its not that I can't use real people, just that I don't like to.
I could daydream that my fiance is here with me having a romantic evening when he's not, but that would feel weird to me. Even though I know the types of things he would say and do, I would be the one making him say and do those things and that doesn't feel right to me. Instead, if that is the sort of daydream I'm craving then I will have two of my characters have a romantic evening.
On the other hand, having any type of daydream involving an acquaintance or a co-worker or someone like that would feel weird having to see them afterward. Even if it where something completely innocent.
Then there are celebrities. I used to daydream about celebrity crushes. The last time I did that it got out of control and hurt the person I was dating at the time (12 yrs ago.) I was so obsessed that I was trying to put the celebrity's attributes on to my real life partner. It ended up making him feel inferior and hurt him deeply. I didn't realize it until after the relationship was over. There were other problems in the relationship, but my celebrity daydream hurt it just as much. I don't ever want to do that to anyone else.
What I will do is sometimes borrow characters from books and such. Maybe change them a little. They are fictional just like my own made up characters. Its never posed a problem for me.
im the exact opposite. I cant daydream about people or situations that Im not involved with in real life.
I never daydreamed about people from real life until last year, when I developed a crush on a guy and started daydreaming about him and his family sometimes.
In the end, I think it comes down to conscious choice vs. unconscious choice, not whether the person is real or imaginary. I have found that I can't force myself to daydream about something. Several years ago, when I had daydreams based on books, I tried to change my daydreams to incorporate characters from a different series. I also tried to make up my own "series" with my own characters to daydream about. It never worked; the daydreams never felt natural. When my mind latches on to a character, that character will naturally become a part of my daydreams. Otherwise, it never works.
I didn't know how to make a new topic, but I am new here and to this whole diagnosis - I had NO idea this was a real disorder. I thought I was odd and a freak . I still think I am a bit crazy, but am beside myself that I am not alone! :-)
Onto this topic, my characters/dreams are not based on anybody I know or even scenarios. All made up.
ps: Any way to talk to others via e-mail?
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