I used to think MD was great!

[Marianella]

I used to think my MD was great. I lived in my own world. I could control everything that happened in it. My 'world' has varied quite a few times, but I'm currently stuck in only one. It's an unhappy world full of abuse. I still thought it was great because I could create and I could make anything happen. But now I find myself blowing off work for school and friends just to live in this dream. I pace and listen to music and talk to myself. I can't get this world out of my head! Any suggestions?

[Reena Patel]

Hey! I was just the same. I didn't talk to anyone, my parents, my friends, I couldn't be bothered to socialise and talk to new people because I was so addicted to MD. And I did EXACTLY the same, I paced around with music and talked to myself eventhough my family thought I was nuts! Do you find that maybe in your MD, you are a different version of yourself where you are more secure and confident? I know we all have MD for different reasons but I had it because I was insecure with myself  and with constant struggles and failures, I have finally managed to stop having MD control my life because I found WHY I had MD. Because I didn't respect myself as a person. I wrote a post about this recently  - I have managed to stop MD. Reading it might help. Feel free to ask me anything :)

[Marianella]

I'm getting so addicted to this. It's extended to the extent that I think about it in school. I can't listen to my favorite band without thinking about this world! It's killing me. The odd thing is, in this world, it's about me being abused by my alcoholic father. In real life, my father is great and loves me. I think maybe it's because in this world, I picture myself being the hero of survival. But I don't know.

[Sparrow]

A lot of the time I have really dark daydreams like you are speaking of.... I think it's because I have a good life but I'm so unhappy, I hate that I am so unhappy because I feel like I have no reason to be, I feel ungrateful and ashamed and like for some reason I am unworthy. I think I have these fantasies where my life is so bad because then, in that moment I have an excuse to feel bad. In the daydreams I am a strong surviver of tragedy when in real life I am sad and pathetic for no reason.  I think I feel unhappy in my life mainly due to it being consumed by day dreaming and me feeling like I have no control over it and feeling like I cant accomplish anything and it's a vicious cycle of self hatred and escape. I was really depressed for a while but eventually I decided I did diverse to be happy and I put a lot of work into loving myself and I have screwed up day dreams less often the better I get at loving myself for who I am MD and all. It is hard though because I still struggle with MD daily. Having scheduled fitness/activity (I really like swimming, dancing, hula hooping and running too but it can be a trigger for me) time has really helped me feel less depressed and escape my addiction to daydreaming a bit. Just forcing yourself to commit to activities outside yourself and reminding yourself how much better you feel after. When it comes time for my plans I never want to do them but I am always grateful after I do so I try to remember that. Addictive behaviour just gets harder to escape the longer you indulge in it. I hope this helps you a bit!