Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
Alright, so...here's the deal. I know that there is the "idealized self" aspect to MD, but have you ever had...14 different versions of yourself? Kind of like you make characters, but well, with yourself I guess. The thing was, that the other versions of myself were never really...created by me. They kind of just...appeared. Although this is also how I get most of my characters...you know, they kind of just...appear. What different between the character and the other "mes" is that if I tried to make a new "me", they wouldn't stick. The only thing that really bothers me is how the other versions of myself multiplied. It started off as 3...and then 1 more. And they just seemed to multiply in random. This recently stopped, but when it was over I realized they all represented an aspect of myself...I'm starting to wonder if some forms of MD are controlled by the subconscious. They were all different, but they all looked like me. I honestly didn't realize the similarities (personality wise) of myself before I broke it down...but after I figured it out they stopped multiplying. I knew that daydreaming can be a form of self expression but...I didn't think it could be this literal. Hahahahaha...
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The last time I remember creating an idealized version of myself was when I was really into my favorite character from an anime I liked, and in my mind I created my own version of him.
I think daydreaming is full of our secret desires and they come from our subconscious. I haven't had more than one version of myself. I think I only focus on one aspect because that is what I need to deal with. Maybe you have multiple things you want to change.
The idealized or better version of me is basically still me but a thinner, more succesful and over better version of me who is loved. Ive had differnt carrers or have pursued goals ive wanted as my real self. I dont personally get into the anime or fantasy type stuff myself but I think my biggest problem is that I think of people from my past way too much-i either miss them or feel sick to my stomach when I think of it all, and my MDD self will tell them off or be strong or missed by either these real or semi-fabricated men.
I have my ideal representation in my MD but not these many... 2..3 enough.
I have a few version of myself and they are all in constant change. Some share same or similar traits as me but the most extreme have little or nothing to do with me, except it's the ultimate me. I have never had random unexplained characters or versions of me entering my fantasizes. Each version is to be a part of scenarios that stimulate different aspects of personal beliefs and interests. Some are complex and others disposable after a few "scenes" and stories, but they all are there to evoke emotions.
i do the same thing!!! I think it is very similiar to Dissasociate Disorder (aka Multiple Personality Disorder).
But i only have like 3 different mes, not 14 lol.
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