Internal dialogue

[Elizabeth]

Hi everyone, I have had maladaptive daydreaming since I was about 13, but I have always had fantasy worlds since I was very little. I am now 22 and I decided to try and stop this. I also have social anxiety, which is probably the main reason this has become an addiction for me. In the past I used to feel extremely empty inside when I tried to stop, but luckily I don't feel that way anymore. However, I still find virtually impossible to stop having conversations with people in my head. I know that that is a pretty normal thing for people to do, but for me it is a trigger that makes me start my daydreaming again (i.e. I start doing things that hinder my productivity in real life, rather than just thinking WHILE I'm doing real life things ). It is a compulsion that I can't stop. It just happens CONSTANTLY without me even noticing. No matter how hard I try I just can't stop doing it.  I want to channel it into something else so it won't make me daydream. So, I want to know if anyone can suggest anything I can do to divert my mind to something else. Because right now I have conversations with specific, imaginary people in my head that are part of my fantasies, which is why it is a trigger for me. I just wish I could think about something else that wouldn't cause me to slip back into this.

Thanks.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much for your reply!

"imagine that someone who makes you fill ashamed is watching you or remember an awkward moment."

Well, that is kind of why I want to stop doing it in the first place. When I daydream, I imagine that someone else is there with me and it makes me have social anxiety even when no one is really there!

I agree that it is counterproductive to try and stop it. Instead, I try to just become aware of it and do not judge myself for it. Then I just remind myself that it's not real and I do not need to subject myself to the stress that comes along with it. I like the idea of trying to get out of your mind and notice the outside. I have tried to do that a little but I keep forgetting to do it. I will try to focus on that more from now on and give it a serious try.

Again, thank you very much! 

[Remus]

Well, you can't stop daydreaming by forcing yourself to stop, that will cause more tension and more daydreams. Instead I found some tricks that work for me: when you start daydreaming, imagine that someone who makes you fill ashamed is watching you or remember an awkward moment. Another way is to visualise yourself daydreaming from outside: your moves, your expression, your eyes; this works particulary good for me, the moment I picture myself dreaming I stop instantly. If this isn't working, I visualise another person I know daydreaming and this works even better. Another way is, for me, to walk slowly and pay attention to what's around me, or pay attention to my body when I take a shower, because I daydream a lot while walking and showering. This shifts your focus from your mind to the outside. Keep in mind that you cannot abstain from daydreaming, so dont try because that will cause more tension. Also, if this methods dont work for you, try to think of other ones, because I think the secret is to find your personal way of stopping MD. Sorry of this comment is too long, if these methods dont work, please tell me because I know others. Good luck!