I used to daydream for hours and now I don't and I didn't take any medication...

[Alan]

If you truly want help read the whole thing....

 

I hope this helps you guys.

 

I noticed that whenever I would think I would not daydream. By thinking I mean basically talking to yourself (and only to yourself) in your head. By doing this I controlled the urge to daydream. I know they say to avoid triggers like music, t.v., etc. to prevent daydreaming but I thought to myself "what kind of life is that?" And I decided to find a way to stop maladaptive daydreaming. Like everyone this disorder caused me social problems, attention problems etc. trust me those aren't problems anymore.

 

Well to make this short and sweet and to the point, all you have to do is have thoughts throughout the day like when you watch TV, listen to music etc. For example I listen to music and I have thoughts like "wow this song is pretty good and those lyrics are amazing" and even if you listen to a song and have thoughts like "I have to do the dishes and have to get ready for work" that's ok even though at first you might think you’re not paying attention to the song you actually are!!! Same goes for when you're watching TV or playing video games I think things like "this show is hilarious" or I might have other things on my mind while watching TV like "I think that the girl I met at the bar is very good looking" even though I'm not thinking about the show I'm watching I'm still paying attention to it. Same thing when someone is talking to you, you can think like this "what she said was funny" or "wow I have to get going or I might be late for work" either way you are still paying attention to what they are saying even though you have thoughts in your head but you don't pay attention if your daydreaming and that's what makes it hard to socialize with others. Another thing that makes it hard to socialize is if you are busy daydreaming you don't filter out what you say and some of the things you say comes off as weird to others. Many maladaptive daydreamers say that they don't know what to say when socializing but you will if you have thoughts when socializing because you develop more of a personality when you have thoughts so I don't have the whole social problem anymore although I was shy at first when I started socializing but I got over it in a week.

 

What I'm trying to say is for you to have thoughts throughout the day. And yes you will daydream still because that is normal but what makes it not normal is doing it for hours, so don't pay attention on how frequent you daydream but just make sure you don't do it for too long so start having thoughts when you feel your daydreaming for too long. I daydream like a normal person now so I only daydream for a minute at most but just like everyone else I zone out from time to time but for a short period of time because if I feel I'm daydreaming for too long I start thinking again to stop it. At first it was hard for me to have thoughts throughout the day and I had to force it a little in the beginning but I got the hang of it and it became natural.

 

I guess by not having thoughts our brain has nothing else to do and so we start daydreaming.

 

NOTE: Maladaptive daydreaming is daydreaming for long periods of time and regular daydreaming is daydreaming for a short period of time.

 

I still have the urge to maladaptive daydream when I get very angry but I just start having thoughts when I daydream for more than a minute to stop daydreaming.

 

I also think that daydreaming realistic scenarios once in a while is normal and useful to problem solve like if I'm planning a party then I daydream about inviting certain people and then I start thinking to see whether or not it's a good idea to do so and all this takes seconds or a minute at most. So I visualize it first (daydream) then I decide whether I should do it or not (thoughts). Sometimes I can both visualize and think at the same time like when I try to remember where I left my keys last, like I visualize where I've been throughout the day and I have thoughts like "Okay I was in my room but I don't remember leaving the keys there but then I went to the kitchen so I might have left them near the microwave."

 

I've asked people if they can think and talk at the same time and some say they can and others say they can't so don't worry if you are talking to someone and can't think at the same time just start thinking after you said what you had to say. I for one can't think and talk at the same time.

 

And it's ok if you miss a few things when you’re paying attention you're human and just like everyone else you will miss a few things but just a lot less compared to the days of maladaptive daydreaming.

 

And by thoughts I don't mean problem solve all the time I mean have a subject to talk about in your head. Problem solve when it's necessary. Even if you don't have a subject to think about just look at your surroundings there's always something to think about or you could think about how you are feeling like I feel bored and I actually think "I hate not having anything to do, I'm so bored right now".

 

At first having thoughts throughout the day is a little difficult but it just takes practice.  By the way before you sleep you will keep having thoughts but when you keep your eyes closed for long enough they start to fade away and then you go to sleep. 

 

All this helped me control my maladaptive daydreaming and now I can be in the present and enjoy my life more.

 

I asked people if they have thoughts throughout the day and they all said yes so I guess having thoughts throughout the day is what normal people do. 

 

I’m not sure about this but I think that having thoughts throughout the day can help people with other disorders such as Asperger’s and other disorders.  I think autistics don’t think much and maybe that’s why they don’t have much of a personality and it’s difficult for them to communicate with others because they have very little thoughts but I’m not sure about this.   

[Alan]

If you don't believe this works just have thoughts whenever you daydream excessively.  You'll stop daydreaming, go ahead listen to a song right now that triggers your Md and have thoughts on the song like have opinions on the song while listening to it.  You'll see that it doesn't make you daydream.  Also ask normal people if they have thoughts all the time and if they ever stop having thoughts.  They will say they always have thoughts and that's its normal.  And when I say have thoughts I mean hear your own consciousness in your own head like when you read silently you hear your own consciousness.      

[Tinkerbell]

I have begun controlling it by focusing more on my thoughts and actions but I had a bad weekend and to get over it, I MDed like crazy.

[ThisIsNotAName]

Hi Alan, I totally agree with you. I also lowered my DD a lot in a similar way.

"I guess by not having thoughts our brain has nothing else to do and so we start daydreaming." really summarize the way I (almost) quit DD.

I would like to add a few things:

I found very useful, to train myself to perform  useful thoughs, to take an agenda and to organize my day.

In fact, when I have in mind a clear of what I'm supposed to do, my DD became shorter and when I feel distracted  I automatically return doing my job with motivation.

Do I stopped DD? absolutely not, also I surely DD much more than average.

But I don't care since the most of the time is spent thinking in a useful way.

I also add that the worst thing one could do is to scold yourself if you're dreaming, instead you should go with motivation to some other useful activity.

PS: sorry for the bad english.

[Swaroop]

Nice to chat with you Alan. As MD is not a listed condition - it could get confusing which method to follow. I am at a place where there are no proper therapists and have to rely on self-therapy like CBT. This seems like a good alternative that I can try by myself. Thanks.