Go on and break this castle of glass, burn it down and burn it fast...

[April Dawn Hale]

Go on and break this castle of glass. Burn it down and burn it fast. It doesn't matter anyway, because every thing falls and every thing breaks. Even the bird that flies above, can be shot down with just one gun.

I wrote this little bit last night and even after morning broke, it still rang true.  I should have checked myself into a hospital or something, because right now I feel just as hopeless as I did before. The headache doesn't help.

I feel like I can't trust anyone anymore.  The only people who seem to give a rats ass are the ones that are in the same place or in similar spots as I am and can't do anything to help.

I just want it to end but I don't have the guts to end it or at least, I don't think I do. I don't know anymore.

[Larry]

Been there before. Actually spent most of the 90's in that mindset.
Hang in there the best you can and don't do anything stupid. I really emphasize this statement.
You'll eventually want to go see a doctor....their drugs work for the desperate kind of depression. If you can't see one for whatever reason, try some St. Johns Wart. You can get it at most grocery stores.
This is how I started the process of getting help.
It's powerful stuff and'll slow the self-loathing long enough for you to figure out what you need to do.
Hang in there girly. It's not much but there's at least one person in the world thinking of ya.