well divorce took forever cost my 6,000 and I got stuck with motorcycles I had to sell for payments. praying they'll keep paying for them. I'm still angry and I don't think I'll ever get over it. my boyfriend is great we have little problems, heck my son takes all my time and working part time to take care of him. so I have no money and way indebt, probably if I can get free legal help file for bankruptcy. but that cost a big chunk of money to file so maybe not. I try not to think about it but it just drags me down and I know its my shitty exs fault and get in a daydream of violent things.

my boyfriend things I should let it go (like I could) if things didn't seem so bleak for me I think I could start. He wants me to stop refering to being stuck in oklahoma. I told him to stop telling me no to things, like someday I always hoped to get a horse. his mom had horses and he doesn't like them so he was all no no no. oklahoma is horse country so its like the one perk this state has. that and he's so used to his retarded brothers that sometimes he's too smart assy. Its hard to deal with when your not at your best.

I am very happy with my son, he's a very happy baby not that he doesn't cry but not too much. sure I haven't slept well since he was born and he makes sure of that on the few nights before work days. I know working full time would help pay off stuff but I really wouldn't trade the time I get to spend with him. I am afraid he'll be a md too as it appears he does the hand thing too. I started when I was a baby also.

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