Anyone else

[Xyz]

This post is going to sound weird but who is normal here anyways?

(Please warning dont try the below you could end up like me and hurt your kidneys)

So I believe am the only one who has this urge to hold in my pee and fantasize about negative scenarios
I have been doing the above since I believe  the age 12 until I finally leak in my pants. And i also feel pain in kidneys and bladder at times but I still cant help it .I still do that till this age (am almost 17) even if i am rite in front of the toilet seat I first complete the daydream before getting it out most of the time.
So many a times I have to change my underwear simply beacuse some amount of urine has leaked out on it.
If there is urine stored in my bladder even if i dont have the urge to go the toilet i get myself to feel it so am able to Md about negative scenarios.
Rite now due to having done that my lower abdomen and both of my kidneys are hurting so i thought i should post it.



I know doing the above is not good but i cant just seem to stop.

[Xyz]

nice theory, does make sense
but that wasn't my story,
I recall this habit started when I was near to the age 13.
I did tell my mom my kidneys are hurting in the morning she just dismissed my complain as she dismissed my 'unusual behaviour' she witnessed many times.
Thanks for taking the time out to read and comment anyways.

[Valeria Franco]

Dear Xyz,

you are right, nobody is "normal" in here and we don't have a definition of weird. We are just people and whatever we are experiencing should be accepted with respect.

I don't know about others experiencing what you are describing and I don't know why it happens but we can make a hypothesis: maybe when you where a little girl you were forced to hold your urge to pee, maybe you weren't allowed to go to the bathroom while you were at school. And maybe, in order to resist, you daydreamed, to take your mind out of the situation.

And so in your mind as the urge to pee came together with daydreaming the two things got connected in your mind and so now, to daydream, you need to feel the urge to pee.

This is just a theory, but it would make sense.

And it does happen that children are forced to hold their physiological needs. Some teachers have the stupid opinion that children want to go to the bathroom just because that don't want to pay attention to the lesson and they think you should learn to relieve themselves only at a certain time.

But the important thing now is your health.

Don't hurt yourself this way. Look for help, psychological and medical, as you could run into bladder infection doing that. You deserve help, you deserve to be healthy and loved and happy.

Have you ever spoken with anyone other than here?