Misophonia, Sensory Defensiveness, and who knows what else....

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

One of my biggest and most troubling symptoms is an extreme sensitivity to many many things.  The biggest one is my sensitivity to sound.  Lip-smacking bothers me so much I press hard on my ears & go into a panic because I just can't bear it.  People smack when they eat, talk, and even just breathe sometimes.  It drives me crazy & makes me want to cry.  Other sounds that bother me are crackling, tapping, or any sharp or unexpected sounds.  It's very serious & makes me wonder if I wouldn't be better off deaf.  I'm not making light of deafness.  It's just that torturous for me.

Through research I've found there are 3 main descriptions for ear sensitivity:

Hyperacusis: physical sensitivity

Phonophobia: fear of sounds in general

Misophonia: extreme hatred of certain sounds.

Misophonia seems the most likely.  It saddens me because people are horribly judgmental about this.  They assume I'm just being rude when I cringe at hearing a sound.  I understand how it can be irritating to be around someone who's constantly cringing when you don't feel like you're doing anything wrong.  I'm not doing this intentionally though.  This is an expression of honest torture.  I may be cringing, but I really want to cover my ears and scream.  I know I'm not the only one in the world who feels this way.  Do any of you have this problem?  

It's not just my ears.  I have a lot of sensory sensitivity.  Lights, for example.  Bright lights don't always bother me, but yellow lighting and especially yellow sunlight bothers me.  I hate bright sunlight more than I can explain.  I dread the summer starting in January.  I get dizzy and feel really uncomfortable in it, but there's nothing physically wrong with me.  I also hate "mood" lighting and any light changes.  When one of my light bulbs goes out, and I have just half my room lit until I can get another I get really dizzy every time I turn on the lights.  The half-lit room makes me so uncomfortable I have to hold on to something until I adjust.  

Lots of things seem to "shock" my senses.  Any kind of unexpected noise or change.  I hate hearing people talk loudly & even whisper when I'm at home.  I flinch when I'm touched & it makes people think I don't like it.  People will tap my arm & apologize when I flinch because they think I don't like that.  That actually doesn't bother me.  It's just a natural reaction.  I can't stand being touched on top of the head though.  

This all appears to be described as Sensory Defensiveness.  I read a few articles on this, and they match how I feel pretty well.  The following is still a mystery:

I can also see air, believe it or not.  I haven't spoken about this much because frankly most people don't believe me.  It's very true and very serious.  It looks like the air is full of glitter, so it's really hard to see in bright light.  The darker the room, the more I can see it.  It makes it really hard to see at night because it looks like I'm walking around in a fog of glitter as well as it being dark.  The funny thing is that my crappy cell phone camera actually captures it pretty well.  It's so tiny that I can barely see the colors, but I can definitely see it.  My grandmother always said I'm seeing energy.  She's the only one who's ever believed me.  

Anyone else experience any sensory sensitivity?  

[Heloise Alexandra Hunter]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floater
Might the above be what you suffer from visually?
I have sensitivity to sounds and light levels, though it has gotten better with age, which makes me think it's psychological in my case, rather than neurological. I live in South Africa where locals are completely comfortable with making the most horrendous noises in public. They suck phlegm from the back of their throats with a loud honking sound. It makes me want to vomit. The cleaner at my work loves nothing more than to sit in a room with me and slurp tea with a spoon and grunt every three seconds. It makes me want to scream and gag her but she's much older than me and I don't want to offend her but I can't stand it. Once I did criticise her and she mouthed off about me in isiZulu to anyone who would listen for 10 minutes. I should bring earplugs to work and pointedly put them in when she starts grunting off.
I cannot sleep without earplugs and pitch-darkness, so I often wear an eye mask too. I hate bright lights just as I wake up and follow my husband around our flat turning all the lights off. It's unnecessary to have them on when the sun is letting enough light in through the curtains. I even turn my cellphone and laptop screen brightness down.
I love SA and all the beautiful landscapes, flora and fauna, but the culture of phlegm sucking in elevators is enough to make me want to escape.
I also hate touch, especially when people touch my hair (even my husband) and especially if they aren't clean. I get incredibly distracted by people putting their feet on couches, reading unclean books in bed, feet on pillows, using towels that have dropped on the floor etc. Hate it. They may as well suck their toes.
I was wondering if anyone out there shares another quirk of mine: When I think about something uncomfortable, awkward or embarrassing I make a noise to distract myself from my thoughts. Since sound distracts me so much it works well but I don't do it intentionally. I just make a noise, say an arbitrary word or phrase loudly and then I think, "Huh? Why did I do that?" Does anybody else distract themselves from their own thoughts with noise?

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

No, I've seen floaters before. This is completely different. This looks like the air is completely filled with a fog of glitter. Since it's tiny & flickery, I can't really see it in the daylight, but at night it makes it very hard to see.
Wow, I thought things were bad here. I feel for you. People here just forget manners. I've tried ear plugs, but having anything in my ears drowning out sound, makes me feel even more disconnected from my environment than I already am with the Maladaptive Daydreaming. I get horribly dizzy & feel strange all over. I feel like I must look like an alien walking around because I feel so disconnected and uncomfortable. Background noise, though it can be irritating, is a necessary tool for keeping my last bit of rapports with my environment. It also keeps me from stepping out into traffic & other dangers. It took years for me to be able to wear headphones & listen to music while walking around. Even now, I have to be super careful when going down stairs or crossing streets. I'm already so dazed & disconnected that it doesn't take much for me to almost fall on my face. I've had so many close calls.



Heloise Alexandra Hunter said:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floater
Might the above be what you suffer from visually?
I have sensitivity to sounds and light levels, though it has gotten better with age, which makes me think it's psychological in my case, rather than neurological. I live in South Africa where locals are completely comfortable with making the most horrendous noises in public. They suck phlegm from the back of their throats with a loud honking sound. It makes me want to vomit. The cleaner at my work loves nothing more than to sit in a room with me and slurp tea with a spoon and grunt every three seconds. It makes me want to scream and gag her but she's much older than me and I don't want to offend her but I can't stand it. Once I did criticise her and she mouthed off about me in isiZulu to anyone who would listen for 10 minutes. I should bring earplugs to work and pointedly put them in when she starts grunting off.
I cannot sleep without earplugs and pitch-darkness, so I often wear an eye mask too. I hate bright lights just as I wake up and follow my husband around our flat turning all the lights off. It's unnecessary to have them on when the sun is letting enough light in through the curtains. I even turn my cellphone and laptop screen brightness down.
I love SA and all the beautiful landscapes, flora and fauna, but the culture of phlegm sucking in elevators is enough to make me want to escape.
I also hate touch, especially when people touch my hair (even my husband) and especially if they aren't clean. I get incredibly distracted by people putting their feet on couches, reading unclean books in bed, feet on pillows, using towels that have dropped on the floor etc. Hate it. They may as well suck their toes.
I was wondering if anyone out there shares another quirk of mine: When I think about something uncomfortable, awkward or embarrassing I make a noise to distract myself from my thoughts. Since sound distracts me so much it works well but I don't do it intentionally. I just make a noise, say an arbitrary word or phrase loudly and then I think, "Huh? Why did I do that?" Does anybody else distract themselves from their own thoughts with noise?

[Arthur James]

Hello, people!

I think the most annoying sound for me is someone chewing gum/blowing bubbles. Yesterday I was sitting in the classroom and the person who was sitting about 10 feet away from me was doing that. Needless to say I was going nuts! However I observed that people who were sitting right next to him didn't pay any attention to it and professor continued with the lecture as if it didn't bother him at all. So that's when I realized that they probably don't percieve this sound the same way as I do, somehow their brain doesn't single out this annoying sound and it doesn't disturb them.

I was reading the previous posts and I guess there are only two things you can do: leave or put on headphones. Am I right? Well, and then of course there's another option - you can kill the person who is making the noize, so that he never makes irritating sounds  again! :) 

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

Part of the reason I cut my hair was due to my extreme sensitivity. It was driving me nuts feeling my hot, thick hair against my neck. I'd keep putting it in pony tails, but then there was always a few strands that would pull extra tight, no matter how I tried to avoid this. So uncomfortable. I'd go nuts trying to find those strands and pull them evenly until the whole thing was all messed up and pulled out. I could never have my hair comfortable. It was below my butt then. Now it's layered, starting just above my shoulders. I still hate the warm, stifling feel of it against my neck and always have it pulled back with a head band when I'm at home. I often wear it loose when I'm in public because I think it looks better. I may not be able to do that in the summer because I really hate the feeling of it all over my face. There's really no way to wear it that doesn't aggravate me in some way. At least I don't have to try and pull it back when I go to bed anymore. Every way I'd wear it would drive me nuts in some way. There's less I have to do with it now, though I still fuss with it a lot.