MD and Socializing

[Jessica Ballantyne]

I was a maladaptive daydreamer for 25 years. I always wanted meaningful relationships and connections in the life. I had the chance, and I could've spoken up if I wanted someone. Instead I preferred to dive into daydreams everyday. This effected my performance around others, giving them a mixed bag of ideas that maybe I didn't like them and was being hostile on purpose. It put on a reputation, and I had many problems finding friends, because my head was stuck the sand of dreams hour by hour. Also, I have Asperger syndrome, which didn't make my situation any easier and I struggled to verbally express myself. Plus, being a maladaptive daydreamer, and an introverted as I was, this kept me sitting in my room over the years, not getting out of my comfort zone to be in contact with people. 

If I understood how to resolve my issues with Asperger syndrome and quit daydreaming, and challenged myself to pay attention to people more, I wouldn't have been so self-isolated. I always believed that life will get better, but it never did get better. I stayed the same individual for the next 25 years, not making a difference in my life. Now I'm filled with regret about it. Wish I took valuable advice early in the game. 

I wrote so many journals and blogged many times online, some people did hear me and give advice, which I should be following. However, there was a road block, and felt discouraged to change my ways at first. I enjoyed the comforts of my home life and my MD. Thing is change makes us happier people, even if we're very uncomfortable at first. I wish that I did make myself uncomfortable and took my chances.