Has anyones MD caused them to lack social skills?

[FunAtmosphere]

I've enjoyed my own company for so long, I've forgotten how to talk to people. When I'm around people i start acting really fake. I'm really shy and introverted because of this.

So I'm just going gave up on the whole 'people' thing, and just gonna stick with daydreaming.

Anyone have this problem? be really interested to know.

[Alice Evans]

I usually just make jokes and make them laugh. Whatever they're talking about, just hop on the boat. That's what I do. After having a conversation, I always think about whether I took it too far. 

[Thierry]

Yeah, I get that. A lot. What's the worst is that real life interactions seem underwhelming now. Nothing's perfect, nothing's clever enough, and many jokes fall flat because you're not the only one laughing at them anymore.

Don't give up. There is hope. I think the most important thing to do is not get rid of the DDing altogether but to limit when you dream. Once a day for an hour is what I have managed to cut it down to. There's no quitting cold turkey. Or at all, ever. It's part of me, and taking it away would be like tearing out stitches.

[MatthewR]

Social skills can be learned and improved over time. However, I do think certain people may have an easier time of it than others, since personality and behavioral traits are at least partly genetic (I think i recall reading at least 1/3 of who we are is biologically determined).

It may be that you are shy and introverted by nature and that your tendency to daydream is a consequence rather than a cause. It's also possible that you have a much lower threshold for stimulation, and that too much activity or commotion will leave you winded or burnt out. I think many people on this site have very intense inner worlds that provide them with the mental stimulation they can't necessarily find in reality, and while that power to immerse oneself in fantasy is deeply satisfying in ways that other types probably can't appreciate, let alone understand, it doesn't do much in the way of helping us interact with others.

Maybe acting fake is a kind of defense against people getting too close. It's much safer in our heads than anywhere else, after all. Maybe if communicating directly is too difficult, you can find some other way to express yourself, like in art or writing where the focus is on transforming inner experience into something real and tangible. 

I do like Alice's advice about going with the flow, and I think Valerian is right about not quitting MD cold turkey. I really think for many of us, it's just a part of who we are and something we should accommodate rather than suppress. I hope this helps. Good luck to you!   

[FunAtmosphere]

Thanks for the advice. :)

MatthewR said:

Social skills can be learned and improved over time. However, I do think certain people may have an easier time of it than others, since personality and behavioral traits are at least partly genetic (I think i recall reading at least 1/3 of who we are is biologically determined).

It may be that you are shy and introverted by nature and that your tendency to daydream is a consequence rather than a cause. It's also possible that you have a much lower threshold for stimulation, and that too much activity or commotion will leave you winded or burnt out. I think many people on this site have very intense inner worlds that provide them with the mental stimulation they can't necessarily find in reality, and while that power to immerse oneself in fantasy is deeply satisfying in ways that other types probably can't appreciate, let alone understand, it doesn't do much in the way of helping us interact with others.

Maybe acting fake is a kind of defense against people getting too close. It's much safer in our heads than anywhere else, after all. Maybe if communicating directly is too difficult, you can find some other way to express yourself, like in art or writing where the focus is on transforming inner experience into something real and tangible. 

I do like Alice's advice about going with the flow, and I think Valerian is right about not quitting MD cold turkey. I really think for many of us, it's just a part of who we are and something we should accommodate rather than suppress. I hope this helps. Good luck to you!   

[The1andonlyAbber]

Yes. I used to be outgoing and never anxious around people until last year, when my MD took a turn for the worse. Now I'm trying to regain the social skills that I lost. It's not easy, but I have been making some progress.

My advice for you is to set small goals for yourself. It doesn't have to be all planned out. It can be small, spur-of-the-moment things like "during this conversation I'm going to say at least [a number] sentences". Also, try to find some interests outside of daydreaming, so when you're talking with people you'll have something to talk about.

I hope this helps. :-)