when will it be in the past?

[Erica Tamizi]

I always like it when people refer to their problems as something in the past and they are happy that they are not dealing with it anymore.

I had anxiety.

I had financial difficulty.

I was in toxic relationship.

I used to hate my life.

When will it be all in the past for me as well? I've been dealing with this for too long and I'm at a point where I don't really know who I am anymore. 

[Jessica Ballantyne]

I believed that beautiful things will start materializing based on my MDD. Instead my excessive daydreaming turned into something dangerous. In my youth, I lived in my head and didn't care to take in mind what was truthfully happening all around me. Now being an adult in my mid-thirties, I'm very stunned at where I am. I'm not successful, independent, financially stable, nor have I been in relationships. I am always dealing with anxiety. I often wish I never started the nonsense, but being 12, I didn't know any better of significant impact it can cause on one's own life. I did go to college, but chose a field that wasn't right for me. After graduation, I struggled to maintain work for a decade, but I kept on flunking. This year, I realize it's time to choose a new career path. If I hadn't been living in other worlds, I probably would've made better educational decisions and been happy with what Im doing today.